grass crunching under him, and knelt behind me, undoing the haphazard knot I’d used to sweep at least some of my hair from my eyes. He combed his fingers through my hair once, almost as though he were about to return my warrior’s braids; then, his fingers began a different and unfamiliar task, twisting my hair up and back and doing his best, with a braid strap, to affix it in place.
“Now turn around,” Mamoru said.
I did so, and faced him hopefully. I’d barely asked “How is it?” before my lord began to laugh at me.
“I’ve done it wrong,” he managed, after he’d regained composure. “It’s all to one side. Either that or it hardly suits you, Kouje. Here, let me try a second time. I’m doing something wrong.”
It took three more attempts before Mamoru achieved a topknot that didn’t send him into fits of laughter, but by the time he was done both our moods were much improved.
“Now,” I said, making an attempt at restoring what order we’d lost in our laughing, “I think it might be a good idea, Mamoru, if we were to bathe here. We are near the river and we might not get another chance for some time.”
My lord’s eyes brightened with a laughter he kept hidden, this time. “Are you suggesting that the need to bathe has become rather dire, Kouje?”
I bowed my head, but it was a friend’s gesture, meant to hide embarrassment and not to offer supplication.
“That’s quite all right,” Mamoru said. He waved his hand as if it were a courtly fan in front of his face. “It is becoming rather dire, all things considered. I’m surprised we managed to sleep at all last night.”
It seemed that he’d made a joke, and so I allowed myself to laugh. “I am glad we’re in agreement.”
“So long as you keep your hair out of the water,” Mamoru stated, as firmly as he had ever issued a command to me before. He was smiling as he rose. “I shouldn’t think it a valuable use of our time if I have to try and master it again. We’d be here for days.”
I nodded, joining him in the joke. “Indeed, it would seem that you will have to style my hair every morning from now on.”
“I shall accept it as my lot in life,” Mamoru said, and placed a hand over his heart in an overdramatic gesture favored by actors from the theatre.
My lord had a curious sense of humor at times, but a lively one. I found myself laughing on the path down toward the river more than I had in all my days since the war’s end combined. Without the palace to press silence in at us from all sides, I was finding myself caught up in conversation with my lord more and more, and I was pleased to learn that we understood one another well enough to wish to continue speaking of nothing at all.
I had always known that my lord was kind, that he was clever and eager to learn, but I had never known him to play the fool quite so often. I would have been able to rest at ease knowing it was his wish only to make me laugh, but I couldn’t help wondering if he weren’t venturing at so many jests to hide his deeper feelings.
We had not spoken of Iseul since leaving the palace that fateful night. I still feared that forcing my lord to confront the truth would break something inside of him, something that I would not be able to fix, but he seemed well enough, laughing at my side all the way to the riverbank.
Still, as we sat by the water and shed our rough costumes, I resolved to keep a better eye on him—a closer eye, if I could. My lord was strong, but I would die before I failed him.
The day would be warm, but it was still early and the heat was manageable. I felt a moment’s regret that we didn’t have the luxury to wait until noon, when the sun would be at its fiercest, and my lord might be able to warm himself on the rocks when we’d finished bathing. Then I pushed it aside. There was no room for me to feel regret, especially not when my lord behaved in a way that would set an example for the most noble and virtuous of men.
I entered the river first. The water pooled around my legs and waist, the