Secrets Whispered from the Sea - Emma St. Clair Page 0,19

dumb question. Why would she have told me was a better one.

“It’s not like we talk.”

She wasn’t wrong. Still, I hated that she hadn’t told me that they were trying to get pregnant, much less that they were going through fertility treatments. It only further confirmed the way I felt like an outsider in my own family.

Still, my whole body ached with the desire to wrap my arms around my sister. I wanted to know if she had had miscarriages, so I could share in her grief. I wanted her to know that I would have walked alongside her, if I had only known. Maybe I didn’t want children of my own, but that was my choice. Ann’s body was betraying her choices. I could imagine how that hurt.

But I did not move. I did not comfort her. Like a coward, I stayed in the confines of the relationship we’d kept for years. Distant. On the surface. Difficult.

“Did Nana know?” I asked.

“Yes.” I could hear the bitterness lacing Ann’s voice like thorns. “You were always her favorite, you know.”

I wanted to argue that Nana loved me and Ann equally. I had no doubt that she did. But Nana and I had always gotten along easily. Our affection flowed like a current, back and forth. It was special. I had always treasured it. Now, seeing the misery on Ann’s face and hearing the hurt in her voice, I hated being the special one. Of course, Ann was the one who got the letter from her, but I wasn’t going to point this out.

“I wish she hadn’t put me in this position,” I said. “I would have chosen you.”

I hadn’t realized exactly how much tension Ann held in her body until it relaxed at my words.

“Thanks,” she said.

“It’s the truth. I think we both know that you’re the one people can really count on.”

At that moment, Tommy strode into the kitchen and wrapped a strong arm around Ann’s waist. He pressed a kiss to her cheek, and I swear Ann flinched a little at his open affection. His eyes moved to me, and I could tell by his smile he was somehow oblivious to the tension he’d just dissolved like soap bubbles in the air.

“So, you made your choice? Stay or sell? Sell or stay?” Tommy asked.

“Sell,” I said, the words feeling like a betrayal and tasting like a lie. But I noted the relief that moved over Ann’s face. Did they need the money that badly? Or did she just want me gone?

“Great,” Tommy said, walking to the fridge to grab a beer. “You want one, Clem?” He held out a second bottle.

I shook my head, shocked that Ann allowed alcohol in the house, and even more shocked that he would even ask me. Ann glared at him. That was maybe the one place where Ann and I agreed, bonding over the common enemy of alcohol. I’d never seen Tommy drinking, not even at their wedding. They toasted with sparkling apple cider, which sparked rumors that Ann was pregnant. Except among those who knew about Mom’s drinking. That’s the thing with high-functioning alcoholics, though—most people would never see the signs.

As far as I knew, Ann had never had a drop to drink. Not one. Ever. I only did the one time, and I regretted that night more than anything else in my life.

Tommy took a quick pull of the beer and kissed Ann’s cheek again, a little closer to her mouth. She definitely flinched that time.

“When do you head back, Clementine?” he asked.

“I’m not going back to Houston. I’m looking for a new job somewhere else, so I’m not sure yet.”

I expected Ann to jump in, telling him that I got fired. But she passed over the opportunity to get in a dig at me. Shocking, but I’d take it as maybe the tiniest sign of progress.

“I’d love to spend some time with the girls while I’m here.”

Ann looked surprised by my words, maybe even a little wary. I couldn’t blame her. I hadn’t been the best aunt ever. But I wanted that to change.

Tommy used his free hand to knock twice on the counter. “Sounds great. Are you staying for dinner?”

“I can’t,” I said, at the same time Ann said, “She can’t.”

Our eyes met, and it felt like something warm and soft traveled between us. Ann gave me a small smile, and I returned it.

“Nice to see you two agreeing for once.” Still chuckling, Tommy lifted the beer to his