The Secrets of Lake Road - Karen Katchur Page 0,92

catching lightning bugs. You remember. You gave me a jar and punched holes in the lid.”

“Yes.” Dee Dee nodded. She remembered. Patricia should’ve been asleep, but it was such a clear beautiful night, she had let her stay up way past her bedtime playing outside, catching bugs. And it was almost dawn by the time Patricia’s parents had burst into the cabin to collect her.

“Kevin was there too,” Patricia said.

Dee Dee whipped around. “What did you say?”

“Kevin. He was there too.”

“That can’t be. He said he was on the beach.”

“No, he was on the pier with them.”

She bent close to Patricia’s face, searching her eyes. “Are you sure?”

“Oh yes, I’m positive.”

CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

Caroline ran from the kitchen and into her room. She slammed her door and threw herself onto the bed. She pulled the quilt Gram had made over her head. She hadn’t meant what she said to Johnny. She didn’t hate him. It was just the opposite. She loved him and wanted him to continue being her brother. She wanted to take back her words. He was as much a victim of their mother’s lies as Caroline was.

Johnny’s voice bellowed from the kitchen. Caroline threw the covers off to listen. “Is it true?” he asked.

Her mother must’ve nodded because the next thing he said was, “Jesus Christ. And you didn’t think to tell me until now?”

She pulled the quilt over her head again. So it was true. She hadn’t realized a small part of her was still hoping she was wrong. Knowing the truth didn’t make her feel any better. It made her feel worse.

Her bedroom door creaked open.

“Go away,” she said, not even knowing who it was. She didn’t care. She didn’t want to talk to anyone.

The door closed and someone sat on the edge of her bed. She smelled coffee and talcum powder, the two smells she identified with Gram.

“Caroline,” Gram said. “I know you’re hurting. It’s a lot to take in.”

“You think?” she shot back.

“Your mother should’ve told both you and Johnny a long time ago.”

“Yes, she should have.” She pulled the quilt down, uncovering her head, but she couldn’t look at Gram. Instead she looked over Gram’s shoulder at a spot on the wall. “Why didn’t you tell me the truth?”

“It wasn’t my place.”

“But I thought you didn’t like Mom. How could you let her lie to me?”

“You think I don’t like your mother?”

“Well, yeah. You two are always fighting. You’re never nice to each other.”

“Oh, Caroline. I love your mother. I may not like the choices she’s made, but I love her.”

“You could’ve fooled me.”

Gram sighed. “A mother-daughter relationship is a complicated thing. We each have our own way of doing things, our own ideas of how things should be, and sometimes we don’t agree on what that thing is. We clash. We may fight. But we love each other anyway. It’s just how it is between your mother and me.” She touched Caroline’s cheek. “It doesn’t mean it has to be that way with you and your mom. You can make it be the way you want.”

“Tell that to her.” She wiped her eyes, refusing to let the tears fall.

“I think you should tell her. Talk to her.”

Caroline picked at a thread that had started to come loose from one of the stitches on the quilt. She was too angry to talk to her mother. She didn’t even want to look at her.

“I don’t hate Johnny,” she said instead. “I didn’t mean what I said.”

“I know you don’t. I’m sure he knows it, too.” Gram paused as though she was considering whether to say anything more. Then she asked, “How did you find out?”

“It’s not rocket science. I did the math.” She stared at the ceiling. “Plus, I found out Billy’s full name. William J. And then I saw a couple pictures of Billy. And then there’s Chris. In ways, Johnny looks like them, their family. I didn’t know for sure. I was only guessing, but it seems I guessed right.”

Gram pressed her lips together and nodded.

“Does Dad know?” she asked, already knowing the answer, but finding she needed confirmation so she wouldn’t question herself later about who knew what and who had lied.

“Yes,” Gram said. “He knows.”

Caroline rolled over and put her back to Gram. She wished she could start over and return to the first day of summer, when her family had made sense in their screwed-up way. She wanted to go back to that day on the beach when Sara had