The Secret French Recipes of Sophie Valroux - Samantha Verant Page 0,91

the chef de cuisine position,” I said. “Honestly, I don’t know what to do.”

“Unless you are committed to your life here, you should seriously think about taking him up on his offer,” said Jane. Her expression said what her mouth didn’t say: I’ll push you upstairs, help you pack, and drive you to the airport.

Phillipa stomped her foot with defiance. “What in sod’s sake? I only wanted to help you clear your name so you’d stay on at the château, not leave it, Sophie. You can’t be thinking about going back to New York. Because you can’t,” she said, racing out of the room. “I’m not happy for you anymore, I’m bloody livid.”

I stood shell-shocked, considering my options. I wanted to run after Phillipa to explain my feelings to her, the confusion swirling in my head, but I was rendered immobile.

“Don’t worry,” said Jane. “She’ll get over it.”

“I won’t.”

I turned around to find Rémi standing in the doorway with Lola in his arms. “What’s this about New York?”

27

confidence and creation

With the added STRESS OF Grand-mère’s health taking a turn for the worse, the next few weeks were beyond uncomfortable. If, for some reason, Rémi and I found ourselves standing in front of one another, he’d ask with a hopeful look in his eyes, “Have you made a decision?” and I’d shrug.

“Until you know what you want, I’m giving you your space,” he’d say and saunter away.

One morning, on my way back from the river, where I often went to think and get away, even with the pies bavardes taunting me with their loud chac-chac-chacs, I ran into him. I had a question, one that would aid me in the decision-making process. Rémi was about to turn on his heel, but I grabbed his arm. “Do you, by chance, know a Jean-Marc Bourret?” I asked.

His face pinched with confusion. “The mechanic in Sauqueuse? What about him? Of all people, why are you bringing up his name?” Rémi pressed his palms to his forehead. “There’s something going on—something you’re not telling me. I can tell. You’re acting all twitchy.”

I couldn’t stop the words before they leapt out of my mouth. “I think he may be my father.”

Rémi’s hazel eyes, the concern darkening them, told me all I needed to know about his feelings for me. “How did you learn of this?”

“Grand-mère and I have been talking about my mother, Rémi. She has a diary. And, until I fully understand what I’ve learned in it, I need for you to understand that I’m not ready for a relationship—with anyone. I need to figure myself out first.”

“Why didn’t you tell me this before?” he asked.

“Because it’s something I need to come to terms with on my own.”

“Sophie, you can’t just bottle up your feelings inside. You’ll explode,” he said. “I know. Because it’s what I did.”

His concern was enough to crack my wavering control, and I burst into tears. Through gasps and sobs, I told him everything. When I got to the part about Grand-mère paying off Jean-Marc Bourret, his eyes narrowed. “Do you want to meet your father?”

“One day,” I said. “But I need to be ready. And I’m just not ready now.”

I took Rémi’s hands into my own, feeling the warmth. His hands were rough and calloused, and so large they dwarfed mine, but they were gentle and his fingernails were trimmed and manicured. He stroked the knuckle of my index finger with his thumb, easing the tension and anxiety sparking my body.

“I understand, Sophie,” he said. “And, regardless of what happens between us, I want you to stay in Champvert, so I hope you find your answers.”

* * *

A bit scattered, I was in the process of planning the Valentine’s Day menu when Phillipa placed her hand on my shoulder. “You’re here in the kitchen. That’s a good sign, right?” she asked with hope.

I hung my head. “I guess. And I have a question. If somebody offered you your dream, one you worked so hard for, what would you do?”

“I’d reconsider my dreams, because they can change with the wind,” she said. “Look, your life isn’t so bad in Champvert, is it?”

“No, aside from Grand-mère’s health, it’s mostly been great,” I said. “But I don’t know jack shit about running a château. It’s kind of a lot to take on. I’m kind of missing my life in New York.”

“I get that, but you have me. I’m here for you. Let’s go through the pros and cons. What about friends in New