Sean's Reckoning - By Sherryl Woods Page 0,31
it was something he’d heard his foster father say on more than one occasion. Evan Forrester had obviously taught him more than Sean had realized.
“Amen to that,” Deanna said. “I only wish there were more places for them to play in our neighborhood. Some of the kids play in the street, but I refuse to let Kevin do that, and the nearest park’s too far away.”
“Ruby could bring him here in the afternoon. There’s plenty of room outside the building, and there are usually a bunch of kids out in front. I could introduce her and Kevin to some of the moms.”
“You wouldn’t mind doing that?”
“Why would I?”
“It might mean you’d be bumping into Kevin more. I’m sure it’s flattering to be idolized the way he idolizes you, but it can take a toll after a while. You might start to want your privacy back.”
“Dee, don’t worry about it,” he said, using the nickname he’d heard Ruby use. “Kevin’s a great kid. He’s not getting on my nerves. I like having him around. And it’s not as if I’m here all that much, anyway. If it’ll make you feel better, have Ruby call me before they come by, to make sure it’s not an inconvenience, but I can tell you right now that it won’t be.”
Deanna didn’t look totally convinced.
“Okay, what else is on your mind?” he asked.
“I’m not sure it’s a good idea for him to start to count on you too much,” she admitted. “It’s not as if you’re always going to be available for him. Despite what you think now, you could eventually meet someone, get married, have your own family. Where would that leave Kevin?”
He carefully flipped a burger as he considered his response to that. “We’ve already discussed the likelihood that I’ll never get married, so that’s not an issue.” He met her gaze. “Dee, I’m not going to let him down. I’ll make it very clear that we’re just buddies. I won’t set up any false expectations.”
“That all sounds very reasonable to me, but I’m an adult, not a five-year-old boy who desperately wants a dad.”
Sean swallowed hard as her quietly spoken words hit home. Of course she was right to be worried. How many times as a boy had he watched with envy as his friends went off to do things with their dads? Evan Forrester had done things with him, but it had taken years before Sean had allowed himself to begin to count on his foster father really being there for him. If anything had happened to jerk the rug out from under his feet once he’d finally started to trust his foster father, it would have been devastating. Kevin had none of those defenses in place. The kid was still innocent enough to wear his heart on his sleeve.
“Would you prefer it if I steered clear of him completely?” he asked, feeling an odd sense of loss even before she replied. Though he spent time with a lot of kids, there was something about Kevin’s cocky self-assurance and his vulnerability that struck a chord with Sean. Maybe he saw himself in the boy.
Deanna stood there, clearly weighing her answer for what seemed to be an eternity before she finally shook her head. “No, that’s not what I want, and I know it’s not what Kevin wants. I just don’t want him to get hurt.”
“Sometimes it’s not possible to protect the people we love from getting hurt,” Sean said. “But I’ll do my best not to hurt Kevin.”
“I know that, or we wouldn’t be having this conversation,” she said. “We wouldn’t even be here.”
Sean tucked a finger under her chin and forced her to meet his gaze, “I’m going to do my best not to hurt you, either.”
She shrugged as if her feelings were of no importance. “Yeah, well, like you said, you can’t always protect people from pain. It’s part of living.”
“You learned that lesson from your ex?”
“Among others,” she said tightly.
“Care to elaborate?”
“Not really. The important thing is that I survived.” She met his gaze. “So did you.”
Long after Sean had walked Deanna and Kevin back home, her words lingered in his head. He doubted she realized the significance of what she’d said. She’d managed to remind him that for most of the past decade—no, even longer than that—Sean had not only survived, he’d worked hard to keep himself safe from being hurt.
But only today had he realized that he—very much like Deanna, whether she realized it or not—had