“An essence is a spirit or a ghostly form of a once living being. The person is still themselves in the sense that they possess a soul, can move, and can communicate. An essence is what humans turn into after they die. They’re not like my lost souls who have disconnected their minds from their bodies due to dying before they were supposed to.”
I think of Nicholas and how he walked the world. He has to be an essence. “But why do you torture your lost souls?”
“Why does anyone torture?” Her silvery lips curve into a grin as she crushes a tulip with her fingers. “For power.”
“But you lost your own soul,” I point out. “Doesn’t that make you want to be . . . I don’t know . . . more sympathetic toward those who’ve lost their souls?”
“Sympathy is weakness, something you should keep in mind before you make your decision.” She dances around again, her silvery body shimmering in the light peeking through the tree branches canopying above us. “You’re a powerful girl, Gemma—I can sense that from you—but your compassion for others makes you weak.”
“I don’t agree with you,” I say, touching my stomach and thinking of how I would throw down my life in a heartbeat to protect my daughter. “Compassion makes me strong.”
Her lips twitch as she spins around and snarls at me, “You’re a stupid girl, then.”
I don’t reply, not because I agree with her, but because I know there’s no point in arguing.
As we near the end of the garden, the queen glides to the side where the path dead ends at a willow tree. Below the drooping branches is a woman with hair like cotton and silvery eyes that sparkle.
“Annabella,” Helena says coldly to the woman.
Annabella smoothes her hand over her floor length dress and bows her head. “Helena, I sensed you crossing here.”
“Of course you did.” Helena stretches her body to rise taller than her sister. “You always do.”
Annabella’s eyes land on me. “And you’ve brought someone with you who seeks something from me.”
“I have.” The queen’s voice is like an arctic breeze.
I warily step below the branches of the willow tree and join the two of them.
“I’ve come to ask you for a favor.”
“I know why you’re here,” she says, her tone lacking emotion. “You want me to free an essence.” She moves around her sister and steps in front of me. “But I don’t understand why you ask for their freedom. I can feel your dislike for this person immensely.”
“I feel guilty over his death,” I admit.
“But Nicholas isn’t a lost soul,” she says. ”Therefore, no one is responsible for his death.”
The willowy branches brush against me as the wind picks up. “I still feel guilty for what happened to him.”
She tilts her head to the side, her hands resting in front of her. “Why do you feel responsible for things that are out of your hands?”
“He died because I exist.” Guilt twists in my stomach. “Many people have.”
“It’s not your fault,” she insists. “Everyone has a path in life, even the lost souls. They’re there because they’re lost, but that’s still where their path led them.” Her silver eyes carry my gaze. “You’re a better person than you think you are. Your soul is so pure.” She holds out her hand, and her skin begins to shimmer gold as an orb forms in her palm. “Nicholas’s essence.”
I hesitate. “You’re just giving it to me?”
She smiles kindly. “Not everything is complicated. Sometimes the answers are right in front of us.”
I graze my thumb across the scar on my palm. “Yes, but not everything is uncomplicated, either.”
She urges the orb at me. “But sometimes our questioning the answers makes things even more complicated.”
“Maybe.” I pick up the essence, noting its warmth against my skin, like sunshine.
“Remember, not everything is as hard as you think, Gemma,” Annabella says, lowering her hand. “Sometimes the answers are right in front of us.”
I nod as she fades away into the tree, her words echoing in my head. Once she’s gone, I follow Helena back through the garden and to the world of lost souls.
“My sister makes things too easy sometimes,” Helena complains as she slips back onto her throne.
“It’s hard to believe she’s your sister.” I cup the orb in my hands. “You two are nothing alike.”
“That’s because she believes in good, which makes her weak.”