Scandalous Scotsman - M.J. Fields Page 0,41
still blame me.”
“And you? What do you think?”
I exhale. “I think it nearly drove me away three years ago, but something happened, and it hit me that she’s worth fighting for. But in that realization came another. I realized my little girl more than likely was hearing what a monster I was, and it caused her to shut down.”
She squeezes my hand. “Didn’t her mother come to the courthouse?”
I nod. “The courts have squashed that and have threatened to take away custody and visitation if they continued to blame me for the accident. So, it’s a non-issue now. Her husband doesn’t ken she showed up, and I can’t for the life of me, regardless of how much pain they have caused me, inflict that on them, unless it takes Kai away from me.”
“That’s awful for you to have dealt with.”
“What’s awful is the system. I shouldn’t have had to fight for so long so my daughter could be with me. But now I’ve got to put that behind me and try my best to make up for all those lost years, because I may be her father, but that man has played the role, and so help me God, if she marries someone like him—”
“She won’t, Ethan. You have an indescribable effect on people.”
I hit the key fob on my vehicle and ask, “Care to explain?”
“You’re powerful, which makes weaker people feel weak, but us fighters feel safe going toe-to-toe with you. I know that makes no sense, but it just is. I even told Tonya that you make me feel stronger. Maybe it’s the way you challenge me, or maybe—”
I grab the back of her head and pull her in for a kiss, one that I’ll always want more of, and one I may never get again.
“Wha— wha— what was that for?” she stammers.
“I want a picture of us.” I pull my phone out and go into full-on selfie mode, which is definitely a first for me, but I want to remember the way her face, her lips, her eyes look after I kiss her.
She smiles, her nose scrunching up, and then she laughs. “You’re as crazy as me.”
“We need to talk.” I guide her inside the car, shut the door behind her, and slowly take deep breaths as I walk around the car and get in.
“Ethan, are you okay?”
Fuck no.
“Could ye grab my phone out of the glove box?”
“You mean the one you just had in your hand?” She laughs.
“No.” I reach over and open the glove box, pulling out the beat-up iPhone 6 that I’ve had for two years now.
“Ouch.” She laughs. “What did that thing ever do to you?”
“Broke me, healed me, and will probably break me again.”
“Um … you’re talking Lizzie now, yet I’m still not able to follow you.”
I inhale a deep breath and turn my body fully to face her. “Do ye remember the day ye came to my office?”
“Of course I remember the day,” she says in confusion.
“Ye stepped on a Lego, fell down the stairs, and then what happened?”
She laughs. “Okay, so is this where you tell me you are a peen pedaling—”
“Elizabeth,” I sigh.
“I’m not judging at all, but I’m sure I would have remembered your peen so …” She stops and looks at me curiously. “I’m confused.”
“Before we go any further, ye do believe me that I never sent you a dick shot, right?”
She nods. “Yeah.”
“Fuck.” I scrub my hand over my face.
She pulls it away and links her fingers through mine. “Ethan, I believe you.”
“I ken.” I nod as my heartbeat increases. “Look, I’m going to admit that I’ve known of ye for two years now.”
“Should I be afraid?”
Jesus Christ, this woman.
“No. Even after I tell ye how, I’m going to ask that ye understand that it was not planned, nor provoked. It wasn’t—”
“You’re freaking me out, Ethan.”
“Well, that’s because I’m not sure how the hell ye’re going to react, and that kind of freaks me out.”
“Then just say it, okay? Because I’m two seconds from diving out of this Tesla and running back toward the crowd.”
“Two years after the accident and a hundred, if not more tests later, any medical reason for Kai not talking was ruled out. It was then they suggested a therapist. I hated every single one, because they sided with Beyza’s father. It was always the strained relationship with the biological father. I got to the point where I was going to leave the country to allow her to have some sort of