The whiskey had numbed my pain enough to hate him.
“Take them off, or I will.” He stood up, looming over me, his hands on his hips.
Exhausted and incensed, I sat glaring up at him acting like a stubborn child.
“Fine.” He shrugged, reaching for me, his hands curling around the waistband, his fingers grazing my hips, igniting the skin where he touched me. He slowly dragged the pants down my legs, gently at the spot where my pants stuck to my wound, and tossed them on the weathered floorboards with a slap.
Wearing only a bralette and prison-issued underwear, I peered down at myself, blinking the tears from my eyes. How fast Halalhaz changed me. A few months were nothing to most, but inside there, it was years.
I had always been thin from training, but fit and muscular. Healthy skin, hair, and nails. A glow in my cheeks. My skin before had been smooth and creamy, Rebeka insisting on facials and spa days along with a healthy diet. Prison robbed me of those qualities. Now, I was unhealthy and gaunt. Every inch of my pallid, dry skin was covered with purple, yellow, and green bruises, my ribs poking through. Veins tinted my translucent skin a greenish-blue color. Deep scars from lashings, beatings, and being knifed hacked my skin like rough terrain.
I hadn’t looked in a real mirror since the night of the party so long ago, and this girl staring back at me over the dresser was no one I recognized. I had seen my face beat up many times. This one held the burden of what I went through internally as well as externally. I was covered in dirt, dried blood, cuts, and bruises. Dark circles underlined my eyes. My usually shiny, long hair was tangled in greasy knots; strands had been falling out more than usual.
Vain or not, I couldn’t stop the sob collecting in my chest at the loss of myself, my youth, and beauty. I turned away from the mirror and took another sip of liquor, my shoulders curling forward in defeat.
“Hey.” Warwick lowered himself in front of me again, his hand tipping up my chin to him. “We’re out. Alive. We made it, Kovacs. That’s better than most.”
“What happened? How did we get out…and Zander—”
“Not right now.” He shushed me. “Let’s worry about one thing at a time. We’re out. Besides your leg, everything else can wait. Okay?”
I nodded, knowing being free was by far the most important thing. I should have been elated, but I couldn’t seem to feel anything. My gaze latched on to his aqua irises like he was the one thing anchoring me to the earth, the feel of his fingers holding my face.
He held my stare, neither of us breaking away. A sensation scratched at my consciousness, something crying out to be recognized, but I couldn’t decipher it. The noise from the outside world dimmed. The only thing I saw was him; the only thing I felt was his touch. There was that awareness again—he was everywhere, inside and outside of me.
His lashes lowered, eyes falling on my lips before they snapped back up, his hand falling away.
Suddenly the noises from the outside world flooded back in with a harsh stab. I inhaled, peering off to the side.
“Drink more.” He cleared his throat, picking up a towel and pouring alcohol on it. “There’s no posh hospitals in the Savage Lands.”
“You know what you’re doing?”
He snorted. “Yeah.”
I didn’t argue, pouring more liquor down my throat. I knew we had so much to discuss, but it could wait for tomorrow. Right now, I just didn’t want to lose my leg to infection.
“If you can’t get it out, leave it.” I downed another swig, no longer coughing over the burn.
“Not my first rodeo.”
“Not shocking.” I heard my words slur and trip over themselves, and my body swayed to the side. Weary, I was giving over to the alcohol, to the utter exhaustion and trauma, my lids drooping.
“Lie down.” Warwick helped me roll onto my stomach on the bed, putting a towel under my leg, propping up my calf. “This is going to really fuckin’ hurt.” The alcohol-soaked rag grazed over my wound.
A scream tore from the depths of my gut, tremendous agony bowing my back before everything went fuzzy.
Then black.
Chapter 27
Pain.
So much.
It engulfed me so tightly I couldn’t decipher the source of it. From my head to my toenails, it drove me awake with a brutal lashing. Lying on my stomach, my face mushed into