Valentine(9)

Despite my love of Valentine’s Day I tried to understand where he was coming from and almost kind of did. Although my husband had a practical nature, he was easy with his ‘I love yous’ and spontaneous little gifts. If you were married to someone like Adam you didn’t need Valentine’s Day. But not everyone had an Adam. Some people needed the reminder to show their partner that they loved them.

“Sweetheart.”

I turned to look at Adam. “Yeah?”

“Where did you go?” His brow was knitted together in concern.

I leaned across the table as I lowered my voice. “Look how bored half of these couples seem. Is that what marriage does to you?”

Adam looked around the room and then back at me. “We’ve been together for over a decade and we’re not bored. Right?”

I shook my head. “Of course not. Still… I wouldn’t want us to go that way.”

“We won’t,” he said, so certain.

I shrugged. “I just think perhaps—” I cut off as the waiter arrived with our starter.

“You just think?” Adam said once the waiter was gone.

“Perhaps we shouldn’t get lazy. You know… we should try to keep things spiced up in the bedroom.”

“For a couple who have two kids and full time jobs I think we’re doing pretty fucking good in the bedroom,” he said, seeming annoyed I’d say otherwise. “Or am I interpreting your orgasms incorrectly?”

I snorted. “No. You are not.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

I swallowed my food and took a sip of wine, giving myself a little courage to say what I wanted to say next. Finally I looked him in the eye. “We haven’t had sex in a public place. Perhaps we should do that.”

Adam gave me a slow, incredulous grin. “Sweetheart, are you joking?”

I frowned at his reaction. “No.”

“Come on, Els. It took you six months to stop blushing every time I called it ‘fucking’.”

A pang of hurt radiated in my chest and I looked down at my plate. I know he didn’t mean to be hurtful but still…

I sometimes thought everyone, including him, thought I was a sweet goody-two-shoes who didn’t know how to be wild and impulsive. A few years back I had a night in with the girls and we all got a little drunk and started oversharing. Jo had told us about a time when her and Cam were first dating and he had seduced her in a changing room in a shop, he was so desperate to have her. And then there was Nate and Liv who had sex on the hood of a car out by a beach one night.

That sounded so thrilling and passionate.

I’d been envious of them both.

Adam and I had a wonderful sex life. We did. But a little adventure would be amazing. Especially now we were parents and got so little time to ourselves, so little time to feel as young as we once did.

But apparently Adam didn’t think I was capable of being sexy, danger girl.

“Christ, Ellie,” he said, his voice soft. “Are you mad at me?”

I looked up into his concerned eyes. “You had sex with that waitress in public on my eighteenth birthday. I found you both going at it behind the hotel.”

Adam frowned at the mention of her. “She was a quick fuck. Not my wife, whom I love and respect.”

Dear God, could he make me sound any more boring?

I grimaced and Adam sat back, wary. “I said the wrong thing didn’t I?”

“Let’s just say I feel as sexy as a ninety year old grandmother with no teeth right now.”