Two fingers slid inside me and I clenched my hands into fists, arching my neck, raising my ass as he pumped those fingers slowly in and out. My body tensed.
“I’m going to come,” I whimpered, warning him.
“Not without me, you’re not.”
Suddenly, he had me on my back again, his expression fierce. He pulled me under him, his chest brushing mine while he gripped my thigh in his hand, parting my legs.
He thrust inside me and we both moaned at the feel of my tight inner muscles pulsing around him. Jake held still for a moment and that something magical that was always there passed between us. Eyes connected the whole time, Jake’s grip on my thigh tightened and he pulled back out only to surge back inside me so deeply, I cried out. I arched against his thrusts, meeting each one with a building urgency.
My muscles tightened, my body stiffened.
I came on a cry of his name, tears in my eyes as I stared into his, my hips shuddering against his with release as he continued to pump into me.
Jake’s jaw clenched and he tensed a second before he came, jerking against me, his warm, long, wet release flooding me.
“Fuck,” he panted, relaxing into me.
I wrapped my arms and legs around him, holding him close.
“Definitely worth it,” he mumbled against my shoulder. “Delayed gratification.”
I chuckled. “Oh, yeah.”
He kissed my collarbone and pushed up, easing his weight off me. I caught the note of seriousness in his expression and waited with bated breath. “Something happened here. I’m not pressuring you into going too fast, but I need you to acknowledge when our relationship is moving forward. I know I don’t deserve it, but it’ll stop me going crazy.” He smirked unhappily. “I’ve been going crazy wondering when you’re going to decide this is a bad idea, and I know I’ll have to live with that. But… I felt something with you tonight…”
“Hey,” I curled my hand around his neck, “I felt it.”
Jake studied me a moment and then whispered, “I love you.”
I gave him a weak smile, pulling him down for a kiss so I didn’t have to see the disappointment in his eyes.
Desperate to move past those three little words and the sudden disconnect between us, I broke the halfhearted kiss to change the subject. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner about Alex.”
Jake rolled off me to lie on his back. I was relieved when he curled an arm around me to pull me into his side. “It’s okay. We’re a work in progress.”
“That we are.”
Silence, not entirely uncomfortable, fell between us and I didn’t know whom I was most disappointed in—myself for being emotionally stunted or Jake for ruining the moment with another “I love you.”
Chapter Nine
In silent mutual agreement, Claudia and I didn’t talk about Lowe’s party. She knew it was final between me and Jake and that I wouldn’t be accepting any new requests to hang out with the guys. She seemed fine with that because it meant she could hide from Beck.
I was sad to lose the guys in losing Jake. Especially Lowe, despite his move to the dark side. We’d traded a few texts over the last few weeks but it was clear that our friendship wasn’t really going to go anywhere if I was hell-bent on avoiding Jake.
Senior year and studying for the LSATs were a great distraction from everything, as were Alex and Sharon who always had something planned for us on the weekend. I wanted to be distracted from Jake. He was a lost cause for me.
My parents weren’t a lost cause, however, and it was becoming increasingly difficult to deal with the estrangement between my dad and me. I think the finality of losing Jake finally broke me. After talking it over with Claudia, I packed a bag the weekend before Halloween and headed to Lanton.
Dad didn’t seem to care whether I tagged along with him to work that Saturday, which hurt my feelings since he loved me tagging along when I was a kid. I was his little assistant. Andie was never interested in cars, but I was curious about anything my dad found interesting and he loved that he could share his work with me.
It was a different story altogether now.
We got to his auto shop and instead of stopping to have coffee and donuts with the two guys on his payroll like he normally would, he went straight to work. He left me in the office with Jed Stewart, a guy around Dad’s age who’d worked for him for ten years, and Milo Atwater. Milo was a cute, slightly unkempt guy who’d been in Andie’s class at school. He’d graduated high school with his GED and come straight to work with Dad because he loved cars more than he loved anything else.
Jed frowned at the door as Dad walked out. “I suppose I’d better get to work too, then,” he grumbled, taking another sip of coffee before striding out.
I picked up a donut and looked at Milo. “You going too?”