“Right now? I’m thinking I want to throw your soup on you.”
She laughed. “I’m just saying… you seem kind of pissed that he’s doing okay.”
“Not pissed,” I huffed. “Confused. I’m a little hurt it’s not killing him like it’s killing me, okay. I think he’s as upset as I am, but then he acts like he’s not.”
“A bit like what you’re doing?”
My mouth fell open.
Claudia smirked.
I threw a cushion at her. “If I want a rational conversation, I’ll call Alex.”
Chuckling, Claudia got up off the couch and started for the kitchen. “Let’s have soup.”
“Let’s talk about the TA,” I called after her.
She smiled at me over her shoulder. “I found him. He’s a grad student now. So hot. He said yes within an instant of me asking him out. Apparently he wanted to ask me out sophomore year, but he didn’t think I was interested. I have got to get less subtle, Charley.”
“Oh yeah, because you’re a real shrinking violet.”
Two seconds later, an oven glove smacked my head.
“Subtle.” I threw it back in her general direction as I opened up my textbook.
Bobb was part of Bobb-McCulloch Halls on the north campus of Northwestern. It was a plain brick building that wouldn’t have been very inviting if not for the stream of students flowing in and out and the far-off beat of music coming from somewhere inside.
“This might not be such a good idea.” I stared nervously at the building.
“We could just go back to the hotel,” Claudia suggested as she stood by my side.
It was amazing how quickly the last few weeks had flown by. I spent my days studying, answering random texts from Jake, talking on the phone to Mom and having one-worded conversations with Dad, and holing myself up in the apartment. Alex would stop by sometimes and ask me to come out for drinks, but I was steadfast on my path to reclusiveness. While I did all this, Claudia studied, ignored phone calls from her parents and Beck, and went on a few dates with Will the TA. Unusually for Claudia, she didn’t talk about the dates and I didn’t ask.
I’d spent the interim weeks between the invitation and the actual party worrying about seeing Jake again and I had no doubt by how quiet Claudia was on the subject that she was anxious about facing Beck. She had major reservations, but I knew she put them aside for me because it was my first time back in Chicago since… well, since everything.
I felt guilty being there for this party when I should’ve been there long ago for a different reason altogether.
I looked at my friend, grateful for her support. “The hotel?”
The guys had invited us to stay at their apartment while we were in the city, but Claudia and I both thought it was safer to get a hotel room.
She smirked at me. “What? We’ve gotten pretty good at running from shit.”
“True. But this we can face up to.”
Once inside we followed the posters directing us toward the party. Not that we needed the posters. The music and kids with plastic cups in their hands were like flashing arrows.
We walked through the corridors in silence, the music growing steadily louder. We passed a couple of open dorm rooms, a few people mingling inside, as we neared the central point of the party.
Gazing into the large common room, I saw a whole bunch of people I didn’t know, drinking and chatting.
I felt Claudia’s hand curl around my wrist and tighten. “You were right,” she said just loud enough for me to hear over The Killers. “Maybe we shouldn’t have come.”
She sounded pained, her eyes locked on something to our left. I followed her gaze.
It took me a moment to register what I was seeing.
And when I finally did, I felt like I was back at that first party in Edinburgh, seeing Jake across the room for the first time in four years.