She shook her head, laughing softly. “So you’re willing to throw yourself on that grenade if it gets tossed your way? But you won’t go looking for it on your own?”
He shrugged. “Something like that.”
They were silent for a long moment, listening to the splash of the water lapping against the sides of the boat, and then she said, “I think you should marry. And right away, too.”
He looked up at her, bemused. “Really?”
“Yes. I think you should marry for love.”
He stared at her, his blue eyes hooded. “What if I don’t ever love anyone?”
Did he really think she was going to buy that at this point?
“Well, that’s your misfortune,” she snapped. “Try loving someone, why don’t you?”
He shook his head, half smiling at her response. “What do you know about love? You don’t love anyone. Or do you?”
She threw out her hands, palms up. “Only you, my liege.”
Closing his eyes, he threw back his head and sighed deeply. “I never know for sure when you’re being serious,” he said softly. “Tell me the truth.”
“I’m being as honest as I know how,” she countered quickly, wishing she dared reach for him. “Ever since my parents died you have been the one person in the world whom I adored. I clung to you, needed you … loved you.”
He looked at her as though that wasn’t what he’d wanted to hear. “That’s a different kind of love,” he said gruffly, looking away.
“Is it? I don’t know. You were the center of my universe.” She watched him avoid her gaze, and then went on. “And then you stopped coming to see me. You stopped answering my letters. And it was as if everything in my world died.”
“Julienne!”
He stared at her, transfixed. What could he say? It was for her own good that he’d done that. He hadn’t meant to hurt her. In fact he’d only meant to save her from what might happen if he saw her too much. He should have been more open about his motives. He should have explained why they were necessary. She was so young—how was she to know the dangers that could lurk in the male heart?
But he should have been more careful. He should have made sure she had someone to turn to. Looking at her now, he ached with regret.
Taking her hand in his, he looked into her eyes. “Julienne, I’m sorry,” he said simply. “I didn’t realize you would be so hurt by my neglect. You are so … so charming and lovely, and everyone loves you. I thought you would hardly notice if I just faded into the background and left you alone. Everyone was so enchanted by you.”
She stared into his eyes, sank into their depths. “I didn’t want everyone. I wanted you.”
Those were the words that stuck with him as the day began to fade. She’d said it starkly. There could be no doubt as to her meaning. And yet there was nothing he could do about it. The future was set in stone.
When they were back in the house he tried to talk to her about Alphonso, about giving him a chance, about trying to like him.
“You do know he collects insects, don’t you?” she told him, when she’d had about enough of his goading.
“He collects what?” He leaned closer to try to hear what she’d said.
“Insects,” she said, as clearly as she could. “Those things with too many legs.”
He sat back, nonplussed but interested. “Well, good. He has a scientific turn of mind.”
“No.” She shook her head. “It’s not like that. He has them in little bottles. All over his room. With little name tags.”
He shrugged. “Latin names?”
She sighed. “Andre, try to focus. There are no scientific notations on these bottles. There are names. Nicknames. Like Fred—and Cindy. Those are two beetles he introduced me to. These little bugs aren’t part of an experiment. They’re pets.”
His face began to mirror distaste at last. “Oh, my God.”
She nodded, glad he finally got it. “Well might you say so.” She flipped her hair back and flashed him a look. “And you want me to marry this man.”
He couldn’t help it. He laughed aloud. And after a moment she laughed along with him.
“You see how impossible it is?” she challenged him.
He shook his head. “I’ll talk to him,” he promised. “He’s young. He’ll change.”
“Really? Can I get that in writing?”
He didn’t answer, but he didn’t have to. She knew in his