He puts his elbows on the table, steepling his fingers. “After talking to Royal Air Force high command, it was decided that you were simply more valuable down here on earth then you would be as a potential astronaut. This is a reflection of your value as a royal prince. It's not a reflection of your performance or any inability on your part. You understand that?”
I feel numb as I nod. “Sir. Yes, sir.”
He clears his throat. “I believe that if you are still interested in moving up the ladder, there is a position available for you. That is, if you decide to continue with the Royal Air Force. I knew a lot of men in you are position that probably would not.”
I glance at him, meeting his gaze had on. “Because I am a prince?”
He just inclines his head.
I shake my head, trying to pretend like he didn't just smash all my dreams. “I'm not so spoiled and materialistic as to want to leave the Royal Air Force, sir.”
He smiles coolly. “No, I suppose you are not.” He checks his watch, clearing his throat. “I have to be on my way now. I suppose I will see you on the base later?”
I slide of the booth, my body immediately stiffening into a salute. “Sir. Yes, sir. Thank you, sir.”
He slowly climbs out of the booth and slaps my back, walking away. I turn and watch him walk out the doors, my heart pounding in my chest.
After a moment of staring, I walked to the door, heading out to the street. It's not so busy here, it's far from downtown and the middle of the work day. I don't know what I'm supposed to do or feel, so I just stare blankly down the street, trying to wrap my head around the fact that I will not be an astronaut.
I clench my fist. I've been lying to myself for a long time. I thought that if I was smart enough, if I was fit enough, if I devoted my life to being the best that I could be, I would escape my family somehow. That I would be chosen to train as an astronaut because I had made myself worthy, not because of some stupid title from of a made up hierarchy. But no, now I see all too clearly.
I am still worth more as the spare to Stellan's heir then I am as me, just a person trying to rise through the ranks. It stings like hell, that thought stated plainly.
Looking down, I start walking back to my apartment, ambling slowly while I turn my thoughts over in my head.
32
Pippa
After Lars leaves, I sit at the kitchen counter, looking listlessly out at the Copenhagen skyline. I'm going to have to come clean to him when he gets back. I know it.
After thirteen years of lies, I'm finally about to tell him that I was born someone else. That thought makes me shiver.
As I finish my cup of coffee, I head to the sink to put the mug down. I hear a bell chime and I cock my head. That's certainly a new sound that I haven't heard before.
I wander into the hallway, where it the chime sounds again, louder this time. I think somehow it's a doorbell, though I don't know exactly where or how to address it.
I run into the bedroom and grab one of Lars’s robes, pulling it around myself before I head down to the very end of the hallway near the elevator. A panel of lights is illuminated there, where normally it would blend in with the beige colored walls. I reach out a hand and touch it as the bell chimes again, revealing a screen.
Mrs. Olson stares up into the camera lens, her mouth set in a grim line. My whole body runs cold. What is she doing here?
I look around for a second, wondering if I can just claim that I wasn't at home. Then again, now that I know that Mrs. Olson works for Queen Ida, it probably goes along that Mrs. Olson will know exactly where I am. Exhaling a long breath, I press the button at the bottom of the screen labeled admit.
Mrs. Olson quickly appears as the elevator doors open, a little smirk on her face. “Hello, Sylvie.”
She doesn't ask, she just barges in, her shoulder bumping mine.
“Excuse me,” I say. “This is the prince's house. You can't just come