Rough and Ready (More Than A Cowboy #2) - Vanessa Vale Page 0,20
wasn’t an expression I expected to see on a tough fighter. Those pale eyes had none of the cold fury he’d aimed at Larry. Only concern. Patience. Curiosity.
I sniffed, tried to push through my embarrassment. “I should go.”
His hands were on my thighs again, this time the touch wasn’t sexual but gentle. I could feel rough callouses, reminding me they were weapons against others. But not me. For me, his touch was gentle and comforting.
“Not yet. I can’t let you leave like this.” His voice was missing that sharp bite from before.
“I’m fine,” I countered, taking a deep breath. I was calmer now, if only I could extricate myself from his lap, from his apartment and die of embarrassment alone. I’d gotten on my knees with the intention of sucking him off. My neighbor! I could never live that down, never look him in the eye again.
“You will be. Just give yourself a minute.”
He was too damn patient. How did a brawler like him end up being so sweet? I didn’t dare ask. I knew he’d been aroused. I’d felt his hard length press against me, and if I glanced down, I’d see the thick outline through his jeans. But he wasn’t doing anything about it. Why?
“Don’t you want me to…” I couldn’t say the rest, just tilted my head down.
“Not tonight.”
Not tonight? I frowned. “But this was just a one-time thing.”
His pale eyes held mine as he reached up and stroked my hair back from my face where it clung to my damp cheeks. “No way.”
“But you don’t want more.”
“I’m not looking for a relationship, no. But I won’t have you getting your needs met by some random guy. He could be an asshole or worse. It’s too dangerous. Like I said before, you come to me if you need to get off.”
“Or cry,” I said, shame faced.
“Or cry,” he repeated. “A release is a release, princess. Feel better?”
I did. Yeah, what he’d done with his thumb had been just short of miraculous, and he’d barely touched me. I could only imagine what it would be like if we took our clothes off, were skin to skin. To say there was chemistry between us was an understatement.
It had just been his concern, his quiet presence that settled me. He knew now that I had some serious issues with my family, but who didn’t? Fortunately, I hadn’t told him about Cam or my mother. He hadn’t known about my need for connection that my therapist called self-destructive. Well, he did now. And still, he wasn’t judging, wasn’t using me for himself. He’d declined a blow job. He could ask for me to get him off—it was his turn—but he didn’t. He probably had the worst case of blue balls and didn’t seem to care.
“I’m to just knock on your door, and we’ll what… fuck?”
He arched a dark brow but didn’t rise to my bait. I was trying to rile him, to see how far I could push him with this. It wasn’t working. “One of these days, princess, I’ll get inside you. When it’s time.”
His words made me shiver. I hadn’t lied when I’d told him I’d want more if I were with him. And not just sex. He was dangerous to my carefully built walls. He’d already gotten past most of it; I didn’t cry for anyone. Ever. If I let him, he’d knock it all down, and then I’d be vulnerable. I couldn’t be hurt again. Couldn’t be made worthless by those who should have cared.
I cocked my head to the side, studied him. “How do you fight in the ring when you’re so damn chill?” I asked.
That got a smile from him. Just that tilt of his mouth, and his entire look changed. Gone was the hard ass, the ruthless competitor. He was rugged and so fucking handsome. My eyes dropped to those lips, wondered what a kiss would be like.
“I figured you to be a cowboy like Gray.”
He shook his head. “I’m more than a cowboy, princess. I’m a fighter. That’s my job. But you’re not my opponent,” he told me. “We’ll do this together. I don’t want a quick fuck with you. I want more. You’re more, Harper, even if you don’t believe it.”
Something flipped inside my chest then, and it was in the vicinity of my heart. It had been walled off for so long that the sensation startled me. Scared me to feel it.