“I don’t think I’ve ever met a deaf cat, or a dog, for that matter. I love animals. Niko here is my best friend. He’s eight years old.”
“I’ve had Halo for so long I can’t imagine life without him. It’s hard to think he is so old now. I worry all the time something will happen to him. Like now, I hope he’s okay. I hope Michael is feeding him and making sure he has fresh water.”
“Michael?”
“My boyfriend. We’ve been together since high school.”
“Not married?”
Everyone says that and yes, it bothers me. Twelve years together and still no proposal. I let out an aggravated sigh.
“No, not yet,” I reply. “He wants to be more financially stable before he gets married and starts a family.”
“I don’t do relationships anymore. I can’t be bothered with all that shit.”
“So you’re just single all the time? That sounds like it could get pretty lonely.”
“Single maybe, but not lonely. I have a bunch of female friends who I hang out and party with. You know friends with benefits. We hang out, have some fun, fuck for a while, and then they go home.”
I am entirely repulsed and move away from him, resuming my spot across the seat to glare at him. “Don’t you think that’s a little bit gross, Storm? Just fucking a bunch of girls?”
He shrugs at me. “No... not at all. They know where they stand. I don’t lead them on and let them think it might ever be something else. We have fun without all the bullshit. I travel a lot. When I’m in town, I call them up. We have some fun, and that’s it. I practice safe sex, so what’s the big deal?”
“It just seems so trashy to me, just to have sex with no love or commitment.” I can’t even imagine a lifetime of nothing but a bunch of one-night stands.
He’s rolling his eyes at me. “Evelyn, there can be sex with no love. They don’t always go together, ya know.”
I scowl at him and pull the blanket further onto me. “Well, they should go together. Just fucking like a bunch of animals with no feelings just sounds gross to me.”
He lights up a cigarette and stares at me for a few moments. I think I’ve insulted him just a bit, but I don’t care. He’s a pig. “Evelyn, love is an elusive thing. Not all people who say it, or claim to be in it, actually are. I think a lot of people get so wrapped up in other feelings like being horny, wanting a relationship, being in lust, and all that shit, then they just label those feelings as love. But true love? The kind of love where you would just die for that person? Where you’d do anything just to be with them? I don’t really think many people have that. I know my parents do. I know my grandparents did. But I’ve yet to find that. So, yeah, I just fuck the chicks I can tolerate for a few hours.” He opens the truck door just a bit to flick out some ashes. “Let me ask you something, Evie. Do you really, really love Michael? Or are you guys just in one of those habit relationships. You’ve been together so fucking long, you don’t even know anymore how you feel because he’s basically become like an old piece of furniture you’ve had forever. You’re afraid to try something new because he feels safe. Feeling safe doesn’t mean love.”
Boom.
Maybe he’s right on a few points there, but I’m not going to admit it to him. The spark flew out of my and Michael’s relationship quite a while ago, but that’s normal in a long relationship, right? We still have fun. We still have sex. Yes, he’s busy and distracted a lot, but I know he loves me and I love him.
Storm is smirking at me. “You’re thinking about what I said... wondering if it’s true. Is it real love or is it just a comfortable rut?”
“You’re an asshole. I love Michael and he loves me. We’ve been together for twelve years. Just because you’re not capable of loving and caring about someone doesn’t mean other people aren’t. I feel sorry for you. You’re going to spend your life being lonely and probably end up with a STD on top of it.”