Rogue Devil (The Rourkes #11) - Kylie Gilmore Page 0,47
it.” He slices a hand through the air. “Me and Stewie. My hot date.”
“Oh.” My heart’s in my throat, adrenaline racing through me. “Blaze isn’t a guy. It’s what I call my vibrator.”
A smile tugs at his lips as he shakes his head. “You got me on that one.” He exhales sharply. “So where does that leave us?”
I break into a cold sweat. “I don’t know.”
He steps closer. “Chloe, tell me you feel something for me.”
I bite my lower lip. This thing between us is deeper than anything I’ve ever felt before, and I’m unexpectedly terrified. Everyone close to me has been ripped away. First my parents, then my sister when she moved to Villroy to be with Adrian. I had to give Sara her freedom; she deserved it. Didn’t mean it hurt any less. I’m always the one left behind. I can’t risk it.
My gut churns, sweat running down my spine. “Bren, you’re important to me. I want you to stay in my life, and—” I practically choke on the words, unable to make eye contact “—friends last longer than lovers.”
He pinches my chin, forcing me to meet his eyes. “I’m talking about a relationship.”
“I can’t,” I say softly.
He drops his hold on me and goes into his apartment without another word.
I stare at his closed door for a moment, my eyes hot before turning to my apartment. I let myself in, heading straight to the bedroom. I drop my purse on the nightstand and flop backward into bed, throwing an arm over my stinging eyes. Is our friendship over forever just because I don’t want what he wants? Doesn’t he understand how risky it is to let deep feelings in? It can destroy you. I never let anyone in that close.
I sniffle and sit up, wanting to call Sara, but then I realize it’s the middle of the night in Villroy. I can’t wake her, especially when baby Henry is still getting up at night regularly. It’s even late in Texas, so I can’t call my friend Lindsey either. The only friend I know is awake is the one person who left me in this agitated state.
I’ll let him cool off and try to talk to him tomorrow. I’m not letting our friendship go so easily. I can’t lose him.
13
Brendan
The next morning I go for a run first thing. I pushed Chloe for more and her answer was clear—hell no. She’s not ready for a relationship, and I, of all people, being king of the casual hookup, really can’t take it personally. She’s just not in the same place in her life as I am. She’s young with lots of work ahead of her, a long arduous journey to becoming a medical researcher. You know, it snuck up on me, but I’m finally ready for a serious relationship. Would you look at that? I’m growing. I head for a nearby park, doing a mental roll call of the women I’ve met who might be worth a call. There could be some potential there I never took the time to explore.
I start at a slow jog. There was that brunette with the piercings. What was her name? Or maybe that redhead—
Chloe at the Christmas ball.
No, don’t think of her.
Soft blond hair, green eyes, smooth flawless skin, those lips with the bow in the top. Fuck. Get out of my head, Chloe.
I run faster, but it’s no use. It’s Chloe my mind returns to again and again. What am I supposed to do about her? She’s here for another month, and then she’ll be heading to Villroy, where her ex will be waiting. She says she’s not getting back with Michael, but I’m sure he’s going to try to get with her. Who wouldn’t? She’s amazing, beautiful, brilliant, funny, sexy. Ugh. I’m never going to get her out of my head.
I run faster and faster until I can’t think of a thing but my next step, my next breath. If only I could keep up the pace.
I slow it down after a while, but then a surprising thing happens as I catch my breath, a peace comes over me. I’m not going to fight it anymore. I’m falling for her and that means I’m going to spend whatever time I can with her, whether or not we ever cross the line into the bedroom. I just want to be with her. Maybe it’ll happen for us down the line, when she’s ready. I shouldn’t push her so much.