inhale, gulping down the entire glass of water before refilling it.
My mind was spinning, heart racing, rib cage closing in on my lungs. Every second that passed, my hands shook more, and the tears I’d managed to hold back flooded my eyes over and over before I’d blink and clear them away.
“All set,” Anthony said, bounding back into the kitchen.
I didn’t realize how much time had passed. Everything felt like a dream.
“Want me to come help? I can take a break from work. It is Saturday, after all.”
“No,” I said quickly.
Anthony frowned.
I swallowed, shaking my head and forcing another smile as I placed my hands on his chest. I wanted to beat my fists on it, scream at him, cry and kick him out and throw the ring on my finger in his face.
But even in my frantic state, I knew that wasn’t the right thing to do.
I needed time. I needed space. I needed to think, to process, to figure out what to do.
Who to trust.
“Sorry,” I said, still smiling. “I just, I haven’t had much time with Annie since I got home, what with her being pregnant and me doing all the wedding stuff. I need some girl time.”
Anthony returned my smile in understanding. “Of course. Well, you two don’t get into too much trouble, okay?”
My smile was shaky, but I held it as long as I could, closing my eyes against the urge to vomit when Anthony leaned in for a kiss. I turned my head, offering him my cheek, and he kissed it sweetly before pulling back, still framing me in his arms.
“See you later this evening?”
I nodded. “Mm-hmm.”
As soon as his hands were off me, I swiped my purse off the kitchen counter, bolting for the door. I practically sprinted across the drive to my car, hands shaking as I pulled the handle and climbed inside. The engine roared to life when I pushed the ignition button, and I threw it into reverse, kicking up gravel with my tires as I flipped it around and sped off down the old dirt road.
My heart kicked hard in my chest, picking up more and more speed with every inch I put between Anthony and myself. My eyes flooded with tears, ones I couldn’t hold back any longer. They slid down my cheeks, hot and searing, my hands tight on the steering wheel, stomach lodged somewhere in my throat.
Halfway down the road to the Main Street drag, I pulled over, trying to calm my breaths before I had an all-out panic attack.
I needed to breathe. I needed an explanation. I needed someone to hold me and tell me it was all going to be okay.
I needed Noah.
The thought hit me as quickly and as unsuspectedly as everything else had that day, but it didn’t make me panic more. If anything, the realization soothed me, blanketing me like a silky sheet of reassurance.
My heart rate slowed.
My breathing evened out.
My hands stabilized, the tears on my cheeks drying, no more falling from my eyes to join them.
For a long time, I just sat there with my hands on the steering wheel, staring at the swirling dust from the road between me and Main Street.
Then, I fished my cell phone out of my purse and texted Annie.
Mom sprung something on me, we’ll have to reschedule our super fun centerpiece building day. See you at church tomorrow.
As soon as the text went through, I turned my phone off, put the car in drive, and floored it across town.
Noah
“Just a minute!” I called from the bathroom, cursing under my breath as I ended my shower prematurely and yanked a towel off the rack. I’d debated ignoring the knock at my door altogether — mostly because I was pretty sure it was someone trying to sell something or convince me to switch religions. But, there was a chance it was one of my brothers, or my mom, since all of them liked to stop by unannounced.
The knock came again, a little louder this time, as I swiped a pair of sweatpants from my bed.
“Yeah, yeah, I’m coming! Hold your horses.”
I grumbled, putting on the first white t-shirt I saw hanging in my closet, even though I was still a little damp. As soon as I was dressed, I stormed across my house to answer the door, frustration boiling even more when yet another knock came. I frowned, blowing out a hot breath and ready to let whoever it was on the other side have