see Dr. Alverez this afternoon was a good decision, even though I was pressured into it.
I even plan to keep the appointment she made for me next week. Talking about my problems with an unbiased person is exactly what I needed.
I’m alone, stuffing my face with the Chinese food Jinx promised on our way into the baby store when a knock sounds at my door. Jinx told me he wouldn’t be around tonight, and I know that’s code for he plans to get laid. I have no opinion about it one way or the other besides being able to finally relax without having someone monitor my every move.
I know he’s coming back tomorrow, so those normal questions of doubt about being abandoned don’t even surface. This was another thing I spoke with Dr. Alverez about earlier.
Lighter on my feet than I’ve felt in weeks, I make my way to the door wondering if Jinx sent Ivy and Delilah over to keep me company or if I’ll find Emmalyn and Misty on the other side.
One quick glance into the peephole destroys all those thoughts because it’s Rocker on the other side of the door. It’s telling that he didn’t just use his key to get in like he’s done numerous times before.
I don’t know if it’s his absence or what, but he looks even more handsome right now, which should be impossible with the way peepholes distort facial qualities.
I open the door, refusing to step aside. He’s got an overnight bag with him, and I want to slap him for his apparent presumption.
“May I help you?”
Don’t get me wrong, I’m ecstatic to see him, but knowing he’s only here because Jinx has other plans lights my skin on fire.
Are his arms bigger, or have they always stretched the fabric of his t-shirt the way they are now?
“Jinx is—”
“Getting laid tonight. I know.”
His lip twitches like he’s going to smile, but he frowns instead.
“Can I come in or do I have to camp out on your stoop all night?”
“You don’t have to camp out. I’m sure your bed back at the clubhouse is just as comfortable as my couch.”
I use the words as a warning. If he comes in here, he isn’t sleeping beside me, no matter how much I’ve missed his warmth in my bed.
“Simone.”
He sounds frustrated, but I know I can’t be the cause. I haven’t texted him once since he walked out of here. I haven’t bothered him at all. If he doesn’t want to be around me because I’m pregnant with a baby that isn’t his, that’s on him. I won’t feel guilty about it. I don’t regret the night that the three of us spent together because I already love this baby growing inside of me, regardless of who the father is.
Frustrated, I step aside, closing the door behind him after he enters.
“Jinx got me Chinese food. I can share.”
I don’t hate that he’s here, but the idea of giving him some of my Mongolian beef makes me weep a little.
“I ate before I came over.”
He drops his bag near the door and crosses the room to sit on the sofa.
“Haven’t seen you in a while,” I say as I pick up the Styrofoam container of the best food in the world and settle back onto the recliner.
His eyes rake down my body, but then he pulls them away to look at the television as if it’s the most interesting thing in the world. The damn thing isn’t even on.
“We went shopping today. Miles bought more things than a kid will ever need.”
His eyes narrow, but he doesn’t look in my direction. I can’t help but wonder if it’s because I used his friend’s real name instead of his road name. I did it purposefully, and from looking at Rocker’s disgruntled face, he knows it too.
“They already delivered the furniture. It’ll take months to put it together. The spare room looks like an explosion.”
“He’ll be an amazing dad.” He nods as if he’s reassuring himself of that fact.
“So I’m beginning to understand.”
“It doesn’t bother you that he’s out hooking up with another woman?”
I drop the fork in my hand. “Why would it?”
He shrugs.
“We aren’t together.”
“I know we aren’t.”
“I mean Jinx and me,” I clarify after he put emphasis on the word, we.
He rolls his head on the back of the couch until his handsome face is looking directly at me.