Road Tripped (Satan's Devils MC Utah #1) - Manda Mellett Page 0,80
not watching others. I’d felt guilty, having left a man heartbroken which had never been my intent, but it wasn’t my fault he’d wanted more than I had to offer.
Since then I’ve been careful, and I’m only too well aware, seen through the bottom of too many bottles of beer, that most of the men around me, in desperation, I wouldn’t turn down. Restricting my alcohol intake is far safer.
I keep my eye on Road, just to make sure he’s enjoying himself and settling in. As I’d predicted, he seems to be getting on great with Grinch. Grinch is exactly what you’d think of if you tried to picture a biker. A long grey beard, a bald head, and a beer paunch hanging over the top of his jeans and an encyclopaedic knowledge of two-wheeled machines.
I’m not disappointed when I look around and spy Brenda, an older woman who sports a head of curly grey hair. As normal, Grinch is sneaking sideways glances at her. Why the hell they don’t get together, I’ll never know. For some reason they think they’re being discreet, but no one will be surprised when Grinch navigates her way sooner or later, then, both will disappear.
There must be a dozen girls and women who’ve turned up, all happy to spend the night or just a few hours in the bed of a biker. I don’t have it in myself to blame them—sex with no strings and no recriminations—what could be better? Snatcher’s already disappeared with the one he targeted earlier, and my pool partner is chatting another up. Thor and Preacher are moving in, and ah, yes. There goes Grinch, heading Brenda’s way now, Road going with him.
Has Road got his eye on the girl who’s barely wearing any clothes standing next to Brenda? I wouldn’t be surprised. She couldn’t really make her assets more obvious.
I notice Road stumbles slightly on his way over and realise he’s tipsy, not surprising. Everyone’s been making sure he’s felt welcome by ensuring he’s had a drink in his hand all night. Even drunk sex, I suspect, with Road wouldn’t disappoint.
I’d like to fuck him and find out.
19
Swift…
But I can’t.
I can’t afford to make what would be a colossal mistake.
It does surprise me how much it would hurt if he were to show an interest in somebody else, and admit my earlier thought was wrong. I’m not suffering from Cowboy’s excellent cooking. Which is crazy. I have no grounds to be possessive. I’ve given him no clues I might be interested in him myself. Looking at it coldly, Road would just be one more dick. I’d hopefully have a good time, and then move on after. Certainly not worth staking a claim over.
I’m not interested. He’s likely to become a brother.
Sure, he’s pretty… Uh-uh. Is that another bitch heading his way? I pull myself up when I realise I’m taking a step which would put me right in her path and block her approach.
This is crazy. Maybe I am ill or something. Road can do what he likes, and who am I to prevent someone from having a good time with somebody else if I’m not making myself available?
I don’t give a damn who’s bed Road ends up in tonight.
I’m lying to myself. I want him in mine.
When I turn my back, knowing it’s safer for all concerned if I don’t watch, I can’t understand myself. I do not get jealous. When a man leaves my bed, he’s free to move on, and I don’t give him a second thought afterwards. Why do I have a feeling it would be different with Road, and that even if he weren’t my teammate, any liaison between us would be dangerous?
Unless he totally sucked in bed, I’d want to go back.
I sneak a peek behind me. A circle of girls has surrounded him now. I can’t take this. I can’t handle this burning feeling inside me. I turn away and walk over to the bar, asking Igor for a soda. Anything to keep my hands occupied and my mind focused elsewhere. I can’t bear to think of the lucky woman who soon will have Road’s hands all over her.
I hate myself for caring. Maybe I should leave and go home?
I might have a room back at the clubhouse but after I got my patch, I invested in a small property in town. It’s got all the features a deaf woman needs, just like I have at the club. It’s my home, my