instructors and students would file in. With the sun, shops and services would begin the day. The farms would stir awake, the community kitchen would smell of coffee and cooking.
There could be peace after war, she thought. There could be normality after nightmares.
And, she knew, there could be solace after the grieving. Renewal after doubt.
Hope after despair.
She heard the sound of the engine, the muscular roar through the quiet. Driving fast, she thought, driving home. And stood to meet him on her feet.
Like the first time she’d seen him, in dreams, with his hair blowing in the wind. But he’d been a boy then. The one who swerved the bike to the curb, cut the engine, swung off to face her was a man.
She’d considered a dozen ways to start this conversation, and at the sticking point tossed them all aside and said what came first. “I’m sorry.”
He didn’t approach her, but stood as he was. “For what?”
“For leaving when you wanted me to stay, when you needed more from me than I could find in me to give. For staying away longer than I’d said I would. And for blocking you out while I was gone, even though I knew it would hurt you.”
“I know why you left, or thought you had to.”
His voice carried calm—he didn’t put a bite or snap in it.
“I figure there’s a reason you didn’t come back when you said you would. I don’t get why you blocked me. I don’t get that, and yeah, you hurt me.”
“I blocked you because I was afraid if I let you in, even for a minute, I’d come back.”
More than a bite snapped out now. “Fuck that. I wouldn’t have pushed you.”
“No. I’m not supposed to say it’s me, not you,” she reminded him, “but it was. I’d have come back before I was ready because I wanted to be with you, and wanted the comfort you’d have given me. I needed you more than I needed to find my resolve again.”
She lifted her hands, helplessly. “My faith and real purpose, lost in grief and a need for revenge. I lost it with Mick, and I had to find it again. I had to, Duncan, or I’d never be able to do what needs to be done. Everything I wanted was here. You, my family, my friends. If I hadn’t left all of that, I’m not sure I’d have found what I needed inside myself to fight again. Or to lead again.”
“Did you find it?”
“I did. But I’m sorry I hurt you. I’m sorry I worried my family and friends. I’m sorry I wasn’t here to help.”
“That’s a lot of sorry.”
“I have more if you need it.”
Studying her face, he shrugged. “That might be enough.”
And in two strides, grabbed her, dragged her in, took what he really needed.
“Oh, thank the goddess,” she murmured and locked herself around him. “Come with me. Will you come with me?”
Without waiting for an answer, she flashed.
The light shimmered, pale green with the sparkling blink of pixies dancing. A pond spread, pure, clear as glass, with moonlight filtering through trees to spill across it. Mists, thin fingers of silver, rose from the water. The air, warm and sweet, held still.
“It’s your faerie glade.”
“It’s where I was before I came back. Right before I— I’ll explain later.” Her fingers dived into his hair. “Can we just talk after?”
Since he wanted her naked, he swept his hands over her, left her clothes, her sword, in a jumbled pile with his before dragging her down to the carpet of grass.
This first, he thought, body to body, skin to skin. This first.
“Touch me.” Her hands ran over him as she murmured against his mouth. “Bring me back to you. Come back to me.”
Light sparked as they came together, over flesh, under it. She felt it pour inside her, fill all the spaces she’d emptied out. She’d turned from him to find resolve, and now, turning back to him, found love.
And pleasure. The beat of his heart, the strength of his hands, the shape of him, the taste.
Here, with him, she could yield, or demand. Abdicate control or take. Here, with him, she could feel all the joy she’d lost.
He gripped her hands to slow them, to slow his own. Looked down at her, at the moonlight mirrored back in her eyes. When he took her mouth again, he stripped off all barriers and let his heart pour into the kiss.