at Maris’s, nor did I think she’d be open to having it where I’m staying. But— “I want to grab the servers by their apron strings and tell them to go away unless I throw rolls at them,” I grumble.
Kara chuckles. “I don’t think they’d appreciate a food fight, Jennings.”
“I think this is why I went into business for myself. I’ve never really had a lot of patience.”
“I—” Kara’s interrupted by our server coming by to ask how we’re faring, increasing my frustration level.
“I’m finished,” Kara says pleasantly.
I scowl and voice, “Same. Also, can you give us a few minutes before you bring us our main.”
“Certainly.” The server disappears with our dishes, leaving us alone.
“You were saying?” I ask.
Kara twiddles with her napkin before laying it down smoothly. “Kevin and I lead a modest life, but we’re happy. What he needs is a solid male role model who’s going to be there for him.”
“I hope I’m beginning to show him I can be that man for him.” I’m probing for an acknowledgement of that from her, and I know it. It’s foolish, yet I need to hear from her she thinks this is going well.
Looking thoughtful, Kara picks up her wine and takes a sip before placing the glass back on the table. “I knew one day, I’d need to be emotionally ready in the event you never came into our child’s life. I mean, I believe in being prepared.”
“That sounds more like a Boy Scout than a student,” I tease lightly, but my stomach is in knots uncertain of where she’s going.
I’m rewarded with faint lift of her lips. “I guess that’s Dean’s influence on me. And on our son since he’s the same way. Why do you think he had that list of questions for you the other morning?”
My own lips curve wryly. “How many are left on there?”
“I’ll never tell.”
“I hope he never runs out,” I tell her truthfully.
Her finger runs lightly around the base of the glass. “Maybe this is going to work out,” she murmurs to herself.
“You thought it wouldn’t.” I reiterate the concerns Jed brought up in his letter. I try not to let the fact the man she’s supposed to have been getting to know over the last several weeks has been making little impression.
Kara looks distressed but squares her shoulders. “It’s not you, Jennings. It’s me. And that’s not an excuse. Trust comes hard. And that’s hard for me as I get to know the man you are today. The man sitting across from me appears to be a good man. But this isn’t sixteen years ago; this isn’t a first date. We’re parents discussing our son. And after everything with my parents and…”
I’m breathing hard as Kara continues. “Not only am I working through getting to know you again, but I’m battling my own regrets that Jed was right. And I’ll apologize now for not trusting him, for not giving you a chance to know Kevin long ago.” The words appear to be torn from her.
My hand reaches across the table for hers. “Kara, there’s no need to apologize. You made the best decisions you could. You tried. I promise, I’m not going to let you down.” I will all the emotion I can through my fingers as I squeeze her hand before she pulls hers away.
“I truly believe you’re trying. Can you understand that right now, for me, that’s a lot?” she pleads.
I’m about to say more when our server arrives with our main entrees. Placing the dish in front of Kara, she offers a demure “Thank you.”
I gruffly say the same.
We’re both eating in silence when Rainey’s words come back to me. Kara’s emotionally light-years ahead of me due to circumstances she had no control over. She gave over her life, her heart, and soul to raise our son. Whereas I’m stepping in at the eleventh hour to fall in love with him.
I can’t be shocked she’s cautious. I would be too. All I can do is my damnedest to support them, emotionally, financially, however they’ll let me.
“You didn’t answer the question I asked about helping you with Kevin,” I murmur, cutting a bite of steak.
She hums. “That’s because I’m still thinking about it. Why don’t you give me a little time to mull it over?”
“How long do you think you’ll need?”
“I don’t know. Maybe another fifteen years? It takes me a while to make decisions, you know.”
My eyes jerk upward. My mouth is already open to snap out