here,” he said, like I was a child waking from a nightmare. Maybe I was.
“Can I ask you a strange question?”
“You’ve cornered the market on strange questions,” he said. “One more won’t hurt.”
“Do you dream about me?”
He rubbed the back of his neck, not meeting my eyes. “Not as much lately. Sometimes I think about what I’d say if I saw you again. Thought about giving you back this—” He fished in his pocket, and I knew instinctively what he was going to draw out.
When he stretched out his hand, the pale yellow star I’d folded for him rested in his palm. The breadcrumb I’d needed. I reached for it, but his fingers curled protectively around it.
“—But I’m keeping it. It reminds me of you.”
“What else did you want to tell me?” I choked out. If I could send Simon a message through his Echoes, maybe he could send one to me.
He ducked his head. “That I’ve missed you. That I’ll wait as long as you need. That you should go ahead and kiss me.”
I laughed despite myself. “I’m closer every day.”
He tucked the star away again, the Key World frequency chiming as he did, counteracting the dizziness that was starting to encroach on me. “You should be closer now.”
He slid a hand around the nape of my neck, and I leaned in, pouring as much promise into the kiss as I could, the faintest hint of rosemary on his lips. Then I broke away, and he studied me again.
“I won’t see you again, will I?”
I shook my head. One kiss—a kiss he asked for, whether it was a request from my Simon or from his heart—felt right. Any more would be using him.
I slid off the wall. “Not here.”
“Del,” he said, grabbing my wrist, the warmth in his voice transformed to worry. “Be careful. Of everyone.”
CHAPTER SIX
I’D VISITED AMELIA EVERY DAY since Simon’s disappearance. Simon had asked me to take care of her, but I would have done it even without my promise. Helping her was the one thing I could do to make up for all she’d lost. Selfishly, spending time with her helped me, too. There was nobody else I could share my grief with: not Eliot, whose feelings were too raw to hear about how much I missed Simon; not Addie, who worried about my mental state; and definitely not my parents, who were completely in the dark, consumed as usual by their work.
The cottage lights glowed warmly, like she’d left them on for me. I headed around back, and before my hand touched the doorknob, a woof and a thud announced my presence.
I let myself in, bracing against the counter as eighty-five pounds of chocolate Lab hurtled toward me.
“Hey, Iggy. How’s she doing today?” I knelt and scratched his ears, kissed the top of his head, and pulled a dog treat out of my pocket. Iggy snatched it up and burrowed closer.
“I’m hanging in there,” called Amelia from the family room. She was sitting on the couch, laptop propped on her knees, medical dictionaries at her side. Before she’d gotten sick, she’d managed a pediatrician’s office; after the diagnosis she’d decided to do transcription from home. “I thought I’d try to do a little work, get back into a routine, but . . .”
But her heart wasn’t in it. I understood. Iggy must have heard the quaver in her voice, because he bounded back across the room. She held up a hand. “No food on the carpet, Ig.”
He snuffled and dropped the treat exactly where the linoleum met the rug, giving her his most winsome expression.
“Beast,” she said affectionately. “Eat up.”
The biscuit disappeared, and a moment later he’d planted himself at Amelia’s feet.
“I swear you’re the only one he listens to.”
“He’s a good boy. Most of the time,” she added, scratching his head. Her hands looked thin and pale against his dark fur. Her hair had grown back enough that she rarely wore a scarf anymore, the short blond strands emphasizing the blue of her eyes and the delicacy of her features. “Rough day?”
“Weird day.” I bit my lip. As cruel as it was to hold back the truth, asking her to live with more uncertainty seemed worse. She wouldn’t be able to see Simon, if he stayed in the Echoes. Then again, knowing he was okay would give her a boost. I stood, wavering. “How was yours?”
“Slow. There may have been some napping involved.” Her sheepish grin was so like Simon’s that my heart