Regretting You (Blackthorn Elite #4) - J.L. Beck Page 0,66
and my mom’s head snaps up to find Jackson looking furious.
“What?” My father looks up from his paper like he can’t believe Jackson is brave enough to say something.
“You heard me, old man. Get the fuck out,” Jackson growl.
“How dare you––” My father starts but is cut off by Jackson’s hand, grabbing a fist full of his shirt to drag him from his chair.
“How dare I? How dare you talk to her like that? You’re her father. You’re supposed to care for her, not make her feel worse. You’re part of the problem, and I’m not standing by and letting her be hurt anymore.”
My father struggles, but Jackson is too strong. He easily shoves my father out of the room while my mother and I watch the scene unfold with our mouths hanging wide open. Jackson slams the door shut, and I jerk at the sound.
Without saying another word, Jackson walks back to the corner and sits down on the chair my father was in just moments ago.
“I’m going to check on your father,” Mom whispers, and I almost roll my eyes. Of course, she worries more about him than me. I nod, and her hand slips away. She steps outside, leaving me alone with Jackson.
“It’s too late, Jackson. Standing up for me now doesn’t make up for what you did yesterday.”
“I know, but I won’t leave you. Even if you don’t want me right now. I know you need me. Your parents just proved that.”
“What I need is space, from you, from them, from everybody. I just want to be left alone.”
“I can’t do that. I’ll give you all the time in the world, I won’t expect anything from you, but I won’t leave your side.”
If he had said those words to me twenty-four hours ago, I would have been happy, ecstatic even. Now, it just drives the knife deeper. Because right now, everything he does is just a reminder of what he didn’t do yesterday… protect me.
27
Jackson
Every time I look at my hands, I see her blood on them. I see her pale face, her closed eyes, and pale pink lips. I almost lost her. Had I not got there when I did, she may not be here right now. Hell, what am I saying? She wouldn’t be in this hospital bed if it wasn’t for me.
Cut yourself a little deeper next time.
I want to rip my own tongue out for saying something so disgusting, so cruel, so horrendous. I knew she was suffering, but my own fragile state overshadowed that. I was selfish and believed someone else without stopping to ask her what really happened. She was the one hurting the most. Jillian died, and the loss of her crushed me, but Kennedy went through so much more than the loss of her best friend.
Had I been at the party that night and not thinking with my dick, maybe none of this would’ve happened. Maybe Kennedy wouldn’t have been assaulted, maybe Jillian would still be here.
I’ve been so busy piling the blame on Kennedy that I’ve never stopped to think about how I played into the situation.
“Are you sure about this?” Kennedy’s mother asks for the third time.
I nod. “Yes. I’ll stay with her and make sure nothing happens.”
The apprehension on her face tells me she doesn’t want to believe me, but, truthfully, she doesn’t have a choice. Kennedy is old enough to make her own choices. She, however, can’t be trusted to stay alone. The doctor recommended someone stay with her for the next few weeks. The other option would be to put her into a mental hospital, which is only happening over my dead body. Her father, of course, was all for it, which almost earned him a fist in his face.
“He said he’ll call us if there is a problem, Claudia, let’s go,” Travis, Kennedy’s father says, his eyes refusing to meet mine. He’s lucky he’s even allowed in the room after all the shit he pulled.
“Okay, okay. I’m just worried. I don’t want to lose her,” Claudia says, her voice cracking. Kennedy hasn’t said but a handful of words to her parents. I haven’t dared tell her mother that I might be the worst person for this job, given Kennedy’s and my past, but I owe her this. I owe it to her to make things right, to protect her, to make sure she gets another chance at this. I can’t let her go, not knowing that I’m the cause.