I’m flattered to have been your inspiration. But you seem to forget, Liam, that you’ve become mine. You’ve seen my illustrations for the books. The album cover.” She moves over next to me. “Do I want to help you overcome your past? Of course I do. I want you to be happy. But damn it, Liam, you have to stop believing I think you’re disgusting. You need to separate what happened to you from who you are. You aren’t disgusting. You need to stop saying a girl like me shouldn’t want a man like you, because guess what? A girl like me does want a man like you.”
I give her a lopsided grin. “You could have just said because I’m hot.”
She falls back and laughs.
I spin around and trap her under me. I lean down and let my lips linger over hers. “I’m not promising anything.”
“I’m not asking for any promises.”
I kiss her. And as she kisses me back, I swear she’s breathing life into me.
~ ~ ~
We get settled on the plane. Jeremy was nice enough to switch seats with Ella, who was several rows back.
Garrett squints at first class. “This is the last time we won’t be sitting up there.”
We look at each other and smile. Jeremy wasn’t kidding about the uptick in sales. Our royalty checks from March were deposited yesterday. They were mind-boggling. April’s is going to be even better.
I’m flanked by Ella, who has the window seat, and Garrett. Brad is sitting behind us with Crew and Bria.
Ella leans over. “Is everything okay with Brad? He doesn’t seem as excited as the rest of you.”
“He hasn’t been happy.”
“He misses Katie.”
“It’s his own fault. He chose someone who hates rock and roll.”
“The heart wants what it wants,” she says.
“Are we still talking about Brad and Katie?”
She smiles.
“I can’t believe it’s over,” Garrett says. “I hope we can get back on the road soon.”
“Not likely,” I say. “They want us in the studio. Jeremy said IRL is expecting two more albums by the end of the year, not to mention more videos.”
“Two?” he says. “You think we can do it?”
Crew and Bria have probably written lyrics to half a dozen songs since they got engaged, and I hear music every goddamn time I look at Ella. “I think we can.”
“I’ve got some lyrics that might work with something,” Garrett says.
I tear my eyes away from Ella. “Wait—you?”
“You think those two are the only ones who can write them?”
“No, but you’ve never said anything before. Why now?”
“Wrote them a long time ago. Didn’t want to step on anyone’s toes. Then when things started to happen, and you got in your slump. I didn’t want to pressure you to put them to music.” His eyes dart to Ella and back to me. “Now that you’re clearly in a different place, I figured it might be a good time.”
“Hell yes. Send them to me when we get home.”
“We’ll be living together,” he says. “I can just hand them to you.”
I laugh. “I almost forgot. Everything is changing.”
The flight attendant stops by with six glasses of champagne. “From the gentleman in 16C.”
We stand and toast Jeremy. After we sit back down, Ella holds up her glass and leans close. “To Luke. Happy twenty-seven.”
My throat tightens but I drink. Nobody has ever toasted his birthday with me. Crew and I get shitfaced every year in August on the day he killed himself, but I’ve always suffered in silence on his birthday.
“You’re right,” she says. “Everything is changing. Things will be different back home.”
She looks sad. I have the urge to hold her hand, but I don’t. “Things will be different, but I won’t be. Then again, maybe I will. Maybe I’ll be better in some way.”
“We won’t see each other very much,” she says. “It’ll be an adjustment.”
“What are you talking about? We’ll run. And we can hang out.”
Her attention shifts to the window. “It sounds like you’ll be busy.”
“Ella.” I wait until she makes eye contact. “I will be busy, but that doesn’t mean we can’t do things. What about the 10K?”
“I guess there’s that.”
I want to tell her there can be more, but I’m not sure there can be. I’ve never been one to give false hope.
“Thank you,” she says, finishing off the champagne.
“For what?”
“For the invitation. For … everything.” She briefly touches my hand. “I’ll never forget these six weeks as long as I live.”
The way she says it, it’s like we’re saying goodbye. And something inside me hurts