I feel a headache coming on. My hair falls over my eyes as my head slumps. I try to rub the tension from my neck. When I look at her, she seems sad.
“Did something happen to you, Liam? Did someone hurt you?”
I look away. The beach is lit by the moon, and I can hear the waves on the sand. I can just make out the sea foam left in their wake.
“It didn’t happen to me,” I say, grabbing the bottle and standing. I start to walk away and say the words I never thought I’d say. “It happened to the kid I used to be.”
I hear the shock in her stifled cry.
“Go back to the hotel, Ella.”
She catches up with me. “How much have you had to drink?”
“I wasn’t here long.”
She takes the bottle from me and examines it to see it’s practically full. She wedges it into the sand next to the boardwalk, then takes off her shoes. “Take yours off, too.”
“Why?”
“Because we’re going on a run.”
“Now?”
“Yes. You told me I have permission to stop you from drinking.”
“But I’ve barely even started.”
“All the more reason to run. It’s cathartic, Liam. It clears your head better than anything I’ve ever known. Now—when you’re feeling like this—is the best time to do it.”
I’m wearing dress shorts and a polo shirt. She’s in a skirt and blouse. She knows what my next argument will be. She takes off the blouse, revealing a tank top. “I can run in anything. Besides, it’s dark and nobody will see us, so who cares what we look like?”
“We don’t have our shoes.”
“We won’t go far. Maybe a mile and back. If our feet start to hurt, we’ll walk. What do you have to lose except the possibility of a killer hangover?”
I take off my shirt and drop it on top of her blouse.
As usual, I have to concentrate on my breathing. She’s particularly quiet, which gives me time to think. Think about what she’s thinking. Think about the fact that I just revealed more to her than anyone other than Crew. Does she think I’m some kind of sicko now?
“Feels good, doesn’t it?” she asks when we make the turn.
My lungs burn. My legs hurt. My feet are raw. But, yeah, it feels good. “Don’t get cocky.”
She laughs and moves ahead.
Returning to the hotel, a million thoughts go through my head, but there is one I just can’t shake. I realize what I hadn’t before. A man had his hands on her, and she was enjoying it. Then she opened her eyes, saw me three feet away, and her whole attitude changed. Is it possible she thought the man touching her was me?
Chapter Twenty
Ella
He’s been avoiding me. For two weeks he’s made excuses, like he has to work on music. It has me wondering if my presence here is no longer required.
Liam avoiding me has its benefits, however. I’ve been working so much that I’m almost finished with the illustrations for the first book. They’re laid out on the floor of my hotel room. I look at each one, making sure I haven’t repeated any of the main elements of the pictures.
I sit and pick one up. I trace my finger across Liam’s eight-year-old face. My heart hurts for the boy he used to be. “What happened to you?” The question has plagued me for fourteen days. Something happened to him, but what? Someone hurt him. Who? I used to think it was a bad breakup, but I fear it’s something worse.
He hates questions. He’s never shied away from telling me this. But then he went and answered the most prying question of all. He answered it and then avoided me.
Is he mad at himself for saying too much? Ashamed at what he thinks I know?
I put away my work and scroll through the recent pictures on my phone. I go to all of their performances and take a picture at every one. Last night they played a small outdoor venue. I was front and center, and got a picture of all five of them. Crew and Bria were singing into the same microphone. Liam and Brad flanked them, both playing their guitars. Garrett was in the background on his platform, one drumstick over his head, the other pounding his snare. I’ve never seen a better picture of the band. It gives me an idea.