“Yeah. Now we wait for them to call formation.” He wrapped his arm around me and tucked me into his chest.
“How long do we have?”
“About another half hour.”
Thirty minutes. How could I fit all of my love into such a short amount of time? My thumb stroked the platinum band of my engagement ring, and I reminded myself that we had forever. This was just a hurdle. “You have the international cell packed?”
“Yes. I’ll pick up minutes once we’re in country. I’ll never be out of contact for long, I promise.”
I nodded. That was one advantage of this being Josh’s second deployment. He knew the ropes already. While I’d never be so needy as to call the cell phone, because only God knew what he could be doing, I took huge amounts of comfort knowing that I could text him in an emergency.
“Remember to have the complex come out and look at the water heater. I should have done it before I left. I’m sorry.”
“Stop. You did everything you could, and our house is brand-new. I can take care of just about anything that pops up, so stop worrying.”
He kissed my forehead, lingering. “Worrying about you is my primary job. I just fly helicopters to pay the bills.”
“I’m stronger than you give me credit for.” God, I hoped that was true. Josh had seen me at my lowest and watched me rebuild my life, but this would take a strength I had to develop all on my own.
“I know how strong you are, December,” he whispered. “Even that won’t change how much I worry about you.”
Then don’t leave me.
We sat there, our arms locked around each other, our heartbeats counting down the moments until he’d be called away. They were the best and worst minutes, flying too quickly. I had never loved him more than I did in that moment. I had never been as scared.
It’s when you realize how close you are to losing something that you finally comprehend just how precious it is.
Mom was wiser than I’d ever given her credit for.
A voice came across the PA system. “Ten minutes.”
Josh sat up straight. “Let me walk you out.”
“What?” I asked, looking up at his stone-set face.
“I don’t want to be with all these people. I want it to be just you and me.” A muscle in his jaw ticked.
“But I don’t want to leave you early, even if it’s just for that minute. I’ll watch you go.”
His face cupped my cheeks. “I don’t know if I’ll be able to walk away if I know you’re watching, December. Please, for me. Let me walk you out.”
“Okay.” He took my hand and walked me past the desperate embraces of the families around us.
The early morning air cooled my heated cheeks as we walked back to where the Jeep was parked. He unlocked the door for me and opened it. Then he opened his arms.
I walked into them, breathing in his scent until my lungs were full. My fingers clenched his uniform. “I’m not ready,” I whispered.
“I know.” He settled his chin on the top of my head. “Nine months, babe. Then I’ll come home, we’ll get married, and our life will start.”
I nodded, fear choking the words in my throat.
He leaned back, tilted my chin, and kissed me. Our lips clung as though they couldn’t bear the thought of being apart, either. “Nine months,” I whispered against his mouth.
“You got it.”
“I love you.”
He rested his forehead against mine. “I love you. Nothing will ever change that.”