The Raven Four Books 1-3 - Jessica Sorensen Page 0,72

a kiss on his cheek, but he doesn’t even so much as glance at her, his eyes fixed on me like a hawk.

Well, this is new. Usually, my uncle only acknowledges my presence when he’s punishing me.

“Breakfast will be ready in ten minutes,” my aunt tells him then whispers, “Last night was amazing.” She gives him a lustful look then struts off toward the stairs.

I nearly vomit in my mouth at not only the idea of them having sex but, if they were last night, then it might have been right after he …

I dry heave. Thankfully, I haven’t eaten anything or I might have puked all over myself.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” My uncle approaches as he readjusts his belt.

I want to ask him what the hell he was burning in that fire last night and who was out there with him, but I know that’ll get me nowhere, other than being pinned down by him on my bed again.

“I’m not looking at you.” I step back into my room and move to shut the door.

He slams his hand against the door and holds it open. “You better start being more respectful toward me. I’ve got a whole list of words waiting to be carved into that pretty little flesh of yours.”

So many words burn at the tip of my tongue, but I swallow them down, too tired and sore to get into it with him this morning.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought.” He grins, but a trace of disappointment reflects in his eyes. Still, he seems pretty damn chipper as he turns around and whistles as he walks away.

Flipping the middle finger at his back, I close the door. Then I grab a pillow, press it against my face, and scream. I scream until my lungs about burst. Until my chest aches.

I scream until I have nothing in me.

Then I lower the pillow from my face and sink down onto the bed, my gaze dropping to my scarred wrist.

Sometimes I think about doing it again—slicing open my wrist and trying to bleed the pain out. Maybe I will one day finally take that final step that will take me into an endless fall toward nothingness. It’s what I thought was going to happen yesterday when I jumped off that bridge. But I didn’t, and now I’m here, because Zay jumped in and pulled me out.

Part of me secretly hates him for doing it. For not just letting me keep falling forever. But he did, and now I’m here, walking around, feeling like I’m wobbling on the edge of a cliff that I could tip off of at any moment.

Fall, Raven. Just let yourself fall.

Maybe one day …

Soon …

Blowing out a breath, I drag my ass off the bed and start getting ready for school.

I decide on a black, short-sleeved shirt, with shorts, fishnet tights, and clunky boots. Then I put on a choker, my leather jacket, tie a plaid jacket around my waist, and call it good. I don’t even bother doing my hair, just combing it to the side with my fingers. Then I dab on my usual minimal makeup—kohl eyeliner and lip gloss.

I go over to my computer chair where my bag always is, but then I remember I left it at school.

Shit. I didn’t even think about that until now. Just like I didn’t think about how I have an absence for the last half of the day. I’m surprised my aunt didn’t mention getting a call that I ditched school. Not that she cares. She just likes to make fun of me for being a loser and a “soon-to-be dropout.”

But my aunt is the least of my problems. If this school works like my other, I’ll get detention for the unexcused absence. So yeah, my day is going to be awesome.

I also don’t have my iPod with me, so entering school is going to be an anxiety nightmare. It’s my security blanket when people stare and whisper. And now I have to ride the bus …

“Dammit, Zay, Jax, and Hunter,” I grumble, even though I’m not sure that I’m really mad at them. Maybe I’m just irritated about my life. About the shittiness of it.

Feeling way too worked up, I decide to take a hit or two before I head out to the bus stop. Hopefully, that’ll keep me chill long enough to get to my locker without panicking.

Grabbing a joint from my new secret spot—the inside of one of my old