Ethan and I were in a very perfect place at the moment…where we didn’t have to panic about what we needed to do, or what bad thing could happen to us, or be shocked about what already had happened to us.
Yes, my life couldn’t compare to any resemblance of what it had been four short months ago, but then again, I was blissfully in love with my new husband and, after the initial shockwave of finding out we were going to be parents wore off, very much in love with that idea, too. I reached for my belly and rubbed over it gently. We had a peach for about two more days. After that? It was onward into lemon territory. My next appointment with Dr. Burnsley wasn’t for another month, and even though the scans might be able to show the sex of the baby that early, I was determined not to find out. I wanted to be surprised, and nobody was changing my mind on the matter. I’d told Ethan he could find out if he wanted to, but he’d better keep the knowledge to himself. He’d just given me a slightly bewildered look that probably meant something like, I love you, but you are downright scary right now, baby, and changed the subject. Such a man. But he was my man, and that was the important thing. We’d get through this frightening process of becoming parents together.
And so here I was, sunning on a private Italian beach at an exclusive villa, expecting that my man might bring me a cool drink when he finished his swim. Not bad, Mrs. Blackstone. I still hardly believed the name was real. The Mrs. Blackstone part was something Ethan took to heart because he sure said it a lot.
I squinted at my wedding ring and spun it around on my finger. I’m married now. To Ethan. We’re having a baby sometime toward the end of February. I wondered when, and if, the disbelief would ever wear off.
I turned my head the other way, readjusted myself on my side, and closed my eyes again, prepared to soak up some more of the glorious Italian sunshine, so abundant here, as opposed to where we lived. Autumn was just around the corner, and then the dreary days of winter in London would be fast on its heels. The time to enjoy the lovely sun was right now, so that’s what I did.
I let my mind wander, going to a place where everything was happy and easy, and tried to put all of the other things that were not happy and easy, away on their respective shelves, locked up tight in that scary cabinet I hated to open. The one for all the bad stuff to sit and gather some dust for a while—the worries about the regrets of life, the losses and the grief, the desperately poor decisions that had been made, and the consequences that resulted from those choices…
ICY drops falling onto my shoulder brought me out of my floaty sleep on the beach. Ethan must be back with my drink. I opened an eye and looked up at him blocking the sun from my body, not appreciating the shocking greeting, and taking in his stern expression. God, he was a beautiful man with his hard lines of muscle and golden skin. I could look at him for years and never be content with the looking. And the complete unconcern with what others might think of him made the combination all the more attractive. Ethan was no pretty boy who got satisfaction out of fawning admirers. And they were frickin’ everywhere. And not only women, either. Plenty of men admired my husband, too. He was oblivious to it all.
“What did you bring me?” I muttered.
He ignored my question and handed me a bottle of cold water. “Time for more sun block, you’re getting a tad pink.”
“You’re just saying that so you can roam your hands all over me,” I said.
He dropped down next to my towel and raised a brow. “You’re f**king right about that, my beauty.”
I sipped some water and closed my eyes as he applied sunscreen all over my shoulders and arms, and relished the feel of his hands on my body. His hands. His touch. The feel of Ethan’s hands on me still rendered me weak. No wonder I was unable to resist him when he pursued me in the beginning. It had been like that from the first for me…with Ethan. His searing gaze across the room at me that night in the Andersen Gallery, the coercion on the street to accept a ride home from a virtual stranger, the way he steered me with a firm hand to my back into his Rover, and demanded I eat the food and water he bought for me, that first demanding kiss in the Shire’s Building hallway, how he took those rights to touch me as if they were his due, with no apology for overstepping social boundaries. That was how Ethan has always been with me.
Ethan’s “claiming” of me had occurred in a way that I understood right from the beginning, even if it seemed ridiculous and unbelievable such a man would be in pursuit of me personally, it still made sense to me when I accepted my fate with Ethan James Blackstone. He had a way of asserting his ownership of me whenever he touched me. Felt like heaven.
“That feels so good.”
He grated under his breath. “I agree. Now turn over.”
I rolled for him and brought my arm over my face to shield the sun. He worked in the sunscreen carefully, making sure he covered every area. When he got to my chest, he dipped his purposeful fingers below the bra of my suit and brushed over my sensitive ni**les—back and forth until they budded up high and tight, making me shiver for more.
“Are you taking advantage of me out in public view now?” I asked.
“Not at all,” he answered, scooting onto my towel to kiss me, “I am taking advantage of you on a very private beach, where nobody will bother us.”
He moved his hands up to take down the straps of my top. Open it fell, and then the glorious rasp of his whiskers brushed the area around my nipple as he teased it. There was a sharp internal zing at first touch now; due to the pregnancy I was sure. My ni**les felt different when he started, but after that first jolt faded away, his sucking and nipping felt just as good as it always had. I ran my hands through his hair as he rained kisses over my br**sts, loving his attentions.
“Just so you know, Blackstone, there won’t be any sex happening on this beach right now.”
“Awww, baby, you’ve just gutted me. I’ve been planning to have a hot beach shag with you for the whole honeymoon.”
“Well, if you have any shot at it you’d best try me once the sun goes down. It’s the middle of the day and we’re out here where anyone could come by and see us. And I’m not putting it out there for public consumption. Didn’t you ever see those shows about the hidden cameras filming beach sex?”
He rolled his eyes and shook his head. “But there isn’t a soul around here for miles. Just the sand and the sea…and us two souls.” He wiggled his eyebrows.
“You are absolutely crazy, do you know that?” I pulled at his chin and kissed him on the lips.
He laughed at me, watching as I pulled the straps of my top back up and covered myself once more. “You’re absolutely crazy beautiful lying on that towel in your bikini. Pretty sure you ought to be illegal wearing that.”
I smiled at him for the praise, hoping it was true, and brought my hand to my stomach. “Pretty soon I won’t want to wear a bathing suit.”
He covered my hand with his. “But you are perfectly beautiful like this. Even peaches thinks so.” He spoke to my stomach, “Peaches? Dad here. Tell Mummy how beautiful she looks in her bikini, would you?”
I laughed at how sweetly adorable he was being, loving him even more than I did before, if that was even possible.
He pushed an ear up against my stomach and paused as if listening, nodding his head a few times in emphatic agreement. “Right. Peaches agrees that you look beautiful, and I would say that I have it on very good authority, that to argue with a baby who has yet to be born is completely useless.”
I sighed in happiness. “I love you, crazy husband.”