All In(33)

“The truth is…I’m yours, Ethan! Now please!” she begged, filling my heart to bursting at the sound of those words.

Absolute perfection. “Yes you are, and I aim to, baby. Pleasing you, pleases me.” I positioned the tip and impaled myself as far as I could go. We both made cries when our bodies connected.

I kept hold of that silky hair as I f**ked into her so I could see her lovely eyes through the mirror. That’s my thing. I don’t know why, but with Brynne I need her eyes when we f**k. I want to look into them and see every sensation, every thrust and pull of our sexes grinding and gripping, driving us forward toward the end, until we lose ourselves in a feeling that can only arrive between the two of us together.

There’s a truth to looking into your lover’s eyes when you come, and drowning in Brynne’s eyes when it happened was a thing so powerfully connective, it bound me to her in a way that meant something important and real. The intensity of what was going on between us scared me actually. It made me extremely vulnerable but it was too late now. I had already fallen.

Her inner muscles pulled in around me as she contracted into orgasm, crying out my name and shuddering. I kept pumping into her depths, feeling every clench and grab of her cunt as I fed her my cock. She felt so good convulsing around my shaft it made my eyes sting.

Brynne’s body was made for the act of sex, but it was her that mattered. It was her that I loved. The seconds just before I climaxed, I thrust into her as deep and as far as I could and put my teeth down on her shoulder. She cried and I registered the sound of her, but couldn’t know if it was from pain or pleasure. I didn’t mean to hurt her but I was nearly out of my mind in that instant, just wanting to hold onto her, keep her with me, fill her up with my spunk, to make her mine.

As the stuff spilled out of me and up into her, I told her again.

“I…love…you…”

I looked into her eyes, at the mirror when I said it.

We didn’t make it to work anywhere close to on time. Didn’t matter. Some things are more important. We were both shattered from the sex and could barely stand after, so I picked her up and took her into the shower with me. I washed her all over and let her wash me. We didn’t talk. We just stared and touched and kissed and thought. After the shower I wrapped her in a towel and took her back to bed; it was only then, with her stretched out beside me all soft and content, that we spoke about things.

“It’s not safe for you to go out alone. You can’t anymore. We don’t know the motives and I won’t risk you.” I spoke soft but firm, I wasn’t budging on this point and it needed to be said. “That’s it.”

“Really? It’s that bad?” She looked surprised and then that fearful look I’d seen before appeared on her face.

“It’s not known what’s going on in Oakley’s camp or his opponent’s. We have to assume Oakley’s got his eye on you, Brynne. He knows where you’ve been these years, where you work, where you live, and probably your friends too. I need to have a talk with Gabrielle and Clarkson soon. They should be briefed in the event they are approached because of their connection to you. Your friends know everything, right?”

She nodded sorrowfully. “I just don’t see why people would want to hurt me. I didn’t do anything and I certainly don’t want to bring up the past. I just want to forget it ever happened! How is this my fault?”

I kissed her forehead and rubbed her chin with my thumb. “Nothing’s your fault. We’re just going to be careful with you. Very—very—careful,” I said, kissing her on the lips three times in succession.

“I don’t want anything from Senator Oakley,” she whispered.

“That’s because you’re not opportunistic. Most people would exploit him for money to keep it quiet. You haven’t done that and they are watching to see what you might do. And I’m certain they are watching to see if Oakley’s enemies try to get to you. And truthfully, his political enemies are who concern me more. The video and Oakley’s knowledge of it, makes him culpable, bottom line. His adult son and friends committed a crime and he covered it up. Oakley’s opponents would find this information a political treasure trove. Not to mention a really sordid news story to sell lots of papers.”

“Oh, God…” She rolled from her side to her back, throwing her arm up over her eyes.

“Hey now.” I pulled her right back to facing me. “None of that, okay? I’m going to make sure they leave you alone for a lot of reasons. It’s my job for one thing, and you’re my girl for another.” I held her face close. “That hasn’t changed for you, has it?” I didn’t let her go because I needed the reassurance. I had to know. “Last night was…fucked up—”

“My feelings haven’t changed,” she interrupted, “I’m still your girl, Ethan. Last night didn’t change anything with me. You have your dark place and I have mine. I understand.”

I rolled her into the covers and kissed her slow and thorough, letting her know just how much I needed to hear those words from her. Still, I wanted more from her though. Always more. How could I ever get enough when she was so sweet and beautiful and lovely?

“I’m sorry about this morning,” she said, tracing my bottom lip with her finger. “I promised I wouldn’t leave you like that again, and I meant it. I’m sad that you thought I would do it too. You scared me when you woke up from your nightmare, Ethan. I hated seeing you hurting like that.”

I kissed her finger. “The selfish part of me was so glad you were here. Seeing you was such a relief, I cannot even express the emotions that went through me when I saw you safe beside me. But the other part of me hated what you witnessed.” I shook my head. “I hated you seeing me like that, Brynne.”

“You’ve seen me after a nightmare and it didn’t change how you feel,” she said.

“No, it didn’t.”

“So how is it any different for me, Ethan? And you won’t share with me…you won’t let me in.” She sounded hurt again.

“I—I don’t know…I’ll try, okay? I’ve not spoken to anybody much about what happened. I don’t know if I can…and I know I don’t want to subject you to that dark place. It’s nowhere I want you to go, Brynne.”

“Oh, baby,” she drew her fingers over my temple and stared into my eyes. “But I would go there for you.” She searched me. “I want to be important enough for you to tell me your secrets, and you have to let me in too. I’m a good listener. What was that dream?”

I wanted to try to be normal for her, I just didn’t know if I could. I guess it was something I’d have to face up to if I wanted to keep her. Brynne was stubborn and a part of me knew she wouldn’t just let this go because I said I didn’t want to talk about it.

“You are important enough, Brynne. You’re all that matters.”