He was on his side on the floor, shuddering, curled up into a ball. Claire slid down next to him and put her hands on his broad back. Under the thin T-shirt his skin was clammy, and his muscles were as tense as steel cable. He was making these sounds, agonizing gasps that werent quite sobs but werent quite not, either.
She didnt know what to do. Shed felt helpless a lot in the past few hours, but this was worse, somehow, because Michael and Eve were nowhere to be seen, and she wasnt sure if Shane would have wanted them to see him like this. Or if he wanted her to see him like this. Shane was all about the pride.
Im okay, he gasped out. Im okay. Im okay. He didnt sound okay. He sounded scared, and he sounded like a little boy.
He managed to sit up. Claire wrapped her arms around him, hugging him tight, and after a few seconds of resistance she felt him sag against her, and hug her back. His hand stroked her hair as if she might break. Shhh, she whispered to him, the way her mother had whispered it to her when things got bad. Youre here. Youre safe. Youre okay. Because wherever hed been in his dreams, he hadnt been any of those three things.
If she expected him to talk about it, she was disappointed. He pulled back, avoided looking at her, and said, You should go to bed.
Yeah, she agreed. You first.
Cant sleep. Didnt want to, more likely; his eyes were red and blurred with exhaustion. I just need some coffee or something.
Coke?
Whatever.
She fetched it for him, and Shane downed it like a frat boy at a mixer, belched, and shrugged an apology. Wheres Michael? She spread her hands. Eve? She did another silent pantomime of ignorance. Well, at least somebodys getting a good nights sleep. They together?
Claire blinked. Idont know. She hadnt thought about it, actually. She hadnt seen them go, didnt know if theyd gone to separate rooms or if Eve had finally worked up the courage to proposition Michael. Cause hed never make the first move. That just wasnt Michael, somehow.
Christ, I hope so, Shane said. They deserve a little fun, even in hell. He was kidding, but not. He did see Morganville as hell. Claire had to admit, he had a point. It was hell, and they were the lost souls, and it was coming on toward morning and shed been scared for what felt like a very, very long time.
He was watching her closely, in a way that made her feel warmth all over her skin, like a light sunburn.
How about us? she heard herself ask. Dont we deserve a little fun?
I did not just say that.