“Duh, Archie.” I gave him a smirk. “So, listen. That young man in your back seat is having a b-day soon, if I recall. Is there a party? Can I do the cake?”
Tyler had a huge grin on his face.
“Gonna be eight!”
“I know! That’s so amazing!” I said.
Archie got the funniest look on his face.
“It’s probably best if you discuss that with Sharon,” he said.
I wanted to talk to Sharon like I wanted to have dinner with Satan and all his buddies.
“Well, maybe just ask her to let me know,” I said. “Y’all have a great day!”
I turned and walked over to our house and climbed the steps without looking back. So that’s how it was now? Sharon was the go-to person? I told myself if I didn’t hear from her in a few days, I’d go over and see what the story was.
“What kept you so long?” Momma said. “Your bacon is done.”
I told her about our exchange. She shook her head.
“Will you pour me some more coffee, please?” she said. “Sharon is the worst.”
I refilled her cup and said, “This is news?”
Leslie walked into the kitchen, took a mug, and filled it.
“G’morning! What’s going on?” she said.
We told her the story and she rolled her eyes somewhere up in her head.
“Oh, God. It’s always going to be something with that beast,” she said. “And she’s cut off Archie’s cojones. He’s going to go along with whatever she wants.”
I thought it was funny that Momma used to be the beast. Now Sharon was. But why was Archie letting Sharon call the shots?
“It’s a shame,” Momma said. “Such a shame. Do you think you might share your bacon, Holly?”
“Sure,” I said and gave her half of what I’d fried. “You want toast?”
“I think I would,” Momma said. “Thank you.”
Hello? Who are you aliens that took my mother? Can you keep her? This one’s halfway nice.
“You’re welcome,” I said and dropped two slices of white bread in the toaster.
“I’ve gotta go and pack,” Leslie said.
“Really? Where are you going?” Momma said.
“Vegas, to see my husband. I’ll be back Sunday,” she said. “He has been begging me to come since the first day he got there.”
“Well, you tell him I said, if we’re going to have a female impersonator in the family,” Momma said, “he’d better be the best damn one the world has ever seen!”
“Oh, Momma!” Leslie said. “That is like the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me.”
I thought I had better go lie down.
Leslie left for Las Vegas, and I didn’t hear anything from Sharon over the next three days, so I took a deep breath and called Sharon that night. She answered on the first ring, but I didn’t read anything into that.
“Sharon? Hey, it’s me, Holly.”
“Hi, Holly. What’s going on?”
“Not much. How are y’all doing?”
“Great, thanks.”
“So I was just thinking about Tyler’s birthday. It’s right around the corner.”
“I’m aware,” she said.
Ooooh, boy. I thought. This is not going to go down as I had hoped.
“I’d like to make a cake for him and I wanted to make sure it was all right with you.”
“Of course! By all means. Make him a cake. That’s very nice of you.”
“Well, I’m delighted to do it. So, if you could just tell me how many people you’re expecting at his party so there’s enough to go around.”
“Let’s see. Well, my parents, so that’s two, my aunt and uncle, so that’s four, Archie, me naturally, and of course the boys. That’s eight.”
I was a little stunned.
“What about Tyler’s friends?”
“You mean you’re thinking we should have fifty children running around, screaming and making a mess? No, no. In my family, birthdays are strictly for family only. I would send cupcakes to school, but school is out for the summer.”
“I see. Okay then. I’ll make a cake for eight.”
“With a little extra for my family to take home.”
“Sure thing.” Was she kidding? “What day are y’all celebrating?” It was all I could do to hide the disappointment in my voice.
“Oh, I think Sunday afternoon would be nice, say early dinnertime?”
“Okay, I’ll drop it off after church.”
His actual birthday was Thursday. What in the world was going through her head? What planet was she from? She was all set to deny Tyler a birthday party with his friends when every single child in his class had a party. But Tyler should celebrate four days late with her parents? I was furious. There was nothing I could do. Nothing. Except, I told my bees.