I think so too. In fact, I know so. But my relationship with Damian isn’t what she thinks it is.
I feel like a jerk and a fool—both at the same time—as I recheck my hair and makeup.
I’ll tell my mother the truth one day. I’ll have to. I can’t live with this lie between us, even if it was originally done out of love for her.
But today is not that day.
THE WEDDING CEREMONY is short and polished and beautiful, and all the guests head to the large ballroom of an upscale hotel for the reception.
Despite the small wedding party and simple planning, Pop and my mother invited a lot of guests. They’ve both lived in Charleston all their lives. They’ve collected a lot of friends over the years, and they didn’t want to leave anyone out.
So the ballroom is full and loud with chatter and laughter. There are heavy hors d’oeuvres rather than a plated dinner, so people wander around, eating and talking, until Pop’s best man pulls everyone together to give toasts.
Damian has been with me the whole time, but he’s left to go to the bathroom when the toasts begin. I give a very short, generic one today. No way am I going to open my heart up in a room with this many people. Everyone else keeps theirs short as well, until Pop gets up to give a toast.
I’m sitting at a table next to Damian’s empty seat as Pop says, “I’m glad y’all could come. Never thought I’d see this day. I don’t deserve it. Made a lot of mistakes. Treated people I love like shit because I was scared of not bein’ in control.” There’s a low murmur at that, and he looks surprised by his own expletive. “Sorry, hon,” he says in a slanting aside to my mother, who just laughs. “Anyway, I did. But God gives second chances even when we don’t deserve ’em, and I’m not gonna waste mine. So here’s to Gloria—my second chance. And for my granddaughters who put up with me till I got here.”
It’s clear that no one expected these words from Pop. Even I know he’s not prone to earnest confessions or sincere affection. His granddaughters are obviously surprised and touched. Sam wipes a tear from her eye. Chelsea hides her face briefly in her husband’s shoulder. And Trevor reaches over to cover Melissa’s hand on the table.
And I feel weirdly shaky, like I’m starting to leave my body and see myself from above.
See it clearly.
The real me.
I wish Damian was beside me so he could put an arm around me or take my hand, but he’s not here. Surely he’s done in the bathroom now. He’s probably standing in a doorway, not wanting to make a scene by traipsing back up to the front while people are talking.
When the applause from Pop’s toast subsides, he says gruffly, “Now go enjoy yourself. There’s gonna be some dancing and drinking. Sorry to all you Baptists out there.”
That’s met with laughter. Part of me wants to laugh too. But I still feel weird. Unstable. Kind of frozen.
I glance around for Damian, but I still don’t see him. Where the hell is he? I need him right now.
Instead of Damian, Melissa Grayson comes over after a few minutes and sits down in his chair. “Hey, everything okay?” She looks lovely in a dusky green dress, her hair swept back in a chignon.
“What? Oh yes, fine. Just looking for Damian.”
“I think I saw him trapped by old Mrs. Pennyworth back there. She talks nonstop.”
“Oh. Okay.” It’s a relief that he has a good reason for disappearing. And after all, I’m fine by myself. “That was a great toast Pop made.”
Melissa laughs softly, her eyes turning to the old man who raised her since her parents died when she was a child. “Yeah. I really can’t believe it. He’s changed a lot in the past couple of years. You wouldn’t recognize him from who he used to be.”
“He seems great now. I know my mom is happy with him.”
“And he’s happy with her. I didn’t think I’d see him really happy again.” She meets my eyes with a sardonic smile. “It seems silly to admit it now, but we were all really worried when we met you.”
“Worried about me?”
“No, no. Not because of you. But because of him. He was really controlling, and one of the things he did was pressure us into getting married. He did it to all of us