I paused, thinking how much I should reveal in my confessions. I’d never told anyone about my plan, it felt too personal. My future family was meant to be all my own, there was no need for anyone to know.
Wyck was no longer just “anyone,” though.
“I wanted to start a family,” I admitted. “You know, to have a baby...”
“And you need money for that?” His dark eyebrow ridges rose in confusion.
“Out there, you need money for everything once the baby is born. But in my case, I had to pay even for getting pregnant.”
“Why?”
“Because I didn’t want to waste my life, waiting for the right man to come along. What if he never came? How long would I be waiting? Neither did I want to have sex with a stranger or a casual partner just to get pregnant.”
He kept staring at me, clearly confused, so I continued explaining, “My parents had me very late in life. Both were gone before I even reached adulthood. I want to spend as much time with my children as possible, to be there for them when they start their own families, and to meet my grandchildren. With the reward money I was supposed get for this mission, I’d be able to afford a nice place without having to work five days a week. I could stay at home and raise my children. I could have the family time I got so little of with my own parents.”
“So, you don’t need a man to have a baby on your planet?” Wyck looked shocked by the fact.
“No...I mean yes, technically, there is still a man involved. Except that I’ve never met him, and I wasn’t going to. He anonymously donated his sperm. The clinic kept it until they sold it to me. A doctor would insert it...um, inside me, to get me pregnant.”
“There is no joy in that,” he stated flatly.
“The procedure is not about joy. It’s about having a baby without being involved with the biological father. It’s easier that way, you see.”
“Maybe, but a family is so much more than just the people you give birth to. You don’t even need to share blood to be a family. My brothers and I are not related by blood but—”
He cut himself short. A dark shadow moved over his features, and I wondered if it was from the memory of one of his “brothers” almost killing him last night.
Feeling the need to comfort him somehow, I placed my hand on top of his.
“True. One doesn’t need to be related to be close like a family. But what if you don’t meet anyone you want to be close to?” I released a long breath. “One has to start somewhere, right? Some people start with a partner. I decided to start with a baby.”
He sat in silence for some time.
“Is that why you want to go back to Earth?” he finally asked. “To get pregnant and start a family?”
“Not just because of that, of course. In my world, I have the freedom to lead the life I like. Here, I’m trapped...”
“You said the return capsule doesn’t work.”
“But it could be fixed. I think. I don’t know for sure, but...” What harm could there be in telling him about Val too, now? Maybe he could help me find her? I knew now I could trust him not to hurt her. “There was another woman on my ship when we crashed.”
“There was?” He straightened his back quickly. “I knew I saw and smelled someone else.”
Smelled.
“Have you caught the same scent anywhere else since?”
“No. Why did you lie about being the only one?”
“Why do you think?” I spread my arms. “By then, most of my crew had been annihilated. I’d been nearly raped by one of you. If Val somehow got a chance to run and hide, I wasn’t going to send all of you on a hunt for her.”
He regarded me for a moment. “Why are you telling me now?”
I squeezed his hand tight.
“Because I trust you, not just with my own life but with hers, too.”
“What do you think happened to her? I haven’t heard anyone speak of another female. I’m sure if someone found her, they’d brag about it.”
“So, that’s a good sign then, right? I hope she hid somewhere and...is still alive.”
To survive all this time, Val would need some food and a source of water. With all resources on the Dark Anomaly being controlled to some extent, those things wouldn’t be