judge's gavel. Sir Jasper had made it clear he did not wish to suffer on his own.
The colleagues had begun to look as though they were sailing in an overcrowded dinghy through a Force Nine before he put his own twist to their discomfort. A strong rumour that McKillin was considering resignation at Easter. Only that twerp of an Environment Secretary Dickie thought it good news; the rest had recognized it immediately for what it was - the Opposition's best hope of salvation, a new start, a clean break with McKillin's fooleries and failures, a leap for firm new ground. Even the other dunderheads had seen that - all except Dickie. He would have to go, after the election.
Only after silence had hung in the air for many seconds did he thrown them a lifeline, a chance to be hauled towards dry land. An election. On Thursday March 14. Just enough time if they hurried and scuttled to tidy up the parliamentary loose ends and a dissolution which would squeeze them through before the next storms hit and overwhelmed them. Not a suggestion, not a request for opinions, simply an indication of his mastery of tactics and why he was Prime Minister, and not any of the rest of them. A strong opinion poll lead. An Opposition in disarray. A Royal scapegoat. A timetable. And an audience with the King in under an hour to issue the Royal Proclamation. What more could they want. Yes, he knew it was tight, but there was time enough. Just.
'Your Majesty.' 'Urquhart.'
They did not bother sitting. The King showed no signs of offering a chair, and Urquhart needed only seconds to deliver his message.
'There is only one piece of business I wish to raise. I want an immediate election. For March 14.'
The King stared at him, but said nothing.
‘I suppose in fairness I must tell you that part of the Government's manifesto will be a proposal to establish a parliamentary committee of inquiry into the Monarchy, its duties and responsibilities. I shall propose to that commission a series of radical restrictions on the activities, role and financing of both you and your relatives. There has been too much scandal and confusion. It is time for the people to decide.'
When he replied the King's voice was remarkably soft and controlled. 'It never ceases to amaze me how politicians can always pontificate in the name of the people, even as they utter the most absurd falsehoods. Yet if I, an hereditary Monarch, were to read from the Testaments my words would still be regarded with suspicion.'
The insult was delivered slowly so that it sank deep. Urquhart smiled patronizingly but offered no response.
'So it is to be outright war, is it? You and me. The King and his Cromwell. Whatever happened to that ancient English virtue of compromise?'
‘I am a Scot.'
'So you would destroy me, and with me the Constitution which has served this country so well for generations.'
'A constitutional Monarchy is built on the mistaken concept of dignity and perfect breeding. It is scarcely my fault that you have all turned out to have the appetites and sexual preferences of goats!'
The King flinched as if he had been slapped and Urquhart realized he may have gone a step too far. After all, what was the point?
‘I will bother you no longer, Sir. I merely came to inform you of the dissolution. March 14.'
'So you say. But I don't think you shall have it.'
There was no alarm in Urquhart's demeanour; he knew his rights. 'What nonsense is this?'
'You expect me to issue a Royal Proclamation today, this instant.'
'As I have every right to do.'
'Possibly. And then again, possibly not. An interesting point, don't you think? Because I also have rights accorded by the same constitutional precedents, rights to be consulted, to advise and to warn.'
‘I am consulting you. Give me as much advice as you want. Warn me, threaten me for all I care. But that cannot prevent you from granting the dissolution I demand. That is the right of the Prime Minister.'
'Be reasonable, Prime Minister. This is my first time at this, I am new to the job. I need to take advice myself, talk to a few people, make sure I am taking the correct constitutional action. I'm sure I could be in a position to grant your request by, say, next week? Not unreasonable, is it? Just a few days?'
'That cannot be!'
'And why not?'
'You cannot expect me to hold an election on Maundy Thursday