“Well,” she beams. “It looks like you’re going to become a mother of four sooner than you thought.”
I cringe as she takes Zeke back to his crib, and I get myself up. There’s a puddle left on the recliner, and shame takes over. I know it shouldn’t, but I guess it’s just a natural reaction. I’m sure these women are used to all sorts of crap in their jobs. I’m sure a little baby juice is nothing new to them.
I stand over Zeke, looking down at him with heartache. I’m not ready to leave him yet, but considering I’m leaving a trail everywhere I go, I kind of have no choice.
“Bye, my beautiful boy,” I murmur, brushing my knuckles over his soft cheek. “Mommy will be back as soon as I can, and I promise we’ll take you home.”
Before I know what’s happening, Tarryn moves in behind me with a wheelchair. “Oh,” I laugh, waving her off. “I’m good. I can walk myself up there.”
“Nope, sorry. Hospital policy. Get your butt in this chair and let me take you up to maternity.”
I groan and lower my ass into the wheelchair. I keep my eyes on Zeke as Tarryn wheels me out, and my heart breaks seeing him being left alone in the big room. Though don’t get me wrong, there are nurses and other parents around, but at this very moment, he’s looking up at nothing but the ceiling when there should be a smiling face staring back down at him.
A contraction comes along, and I adjust myself in the chair. It’s not exactly a comfortable position to be in, but nothing really is when you’re this pregnant.
Tarryn pushes me inside the elevator and presses the button for level two before chatting away about Zeke’s condition. Truth be told, I’m completely zoning out and going into panic mode. This wasn’t supposed to happen like this. I still have a few weeks to go. Is it even safe for me to deliver a few weeks early? I was a week early with Coby, but how early is too early? Surely Tarryn would have a quicker pace on her if she thought the baby or I were in any type of danger.
I let that thought settle my mind and start going over everything. This certainly wasn’t what I was expecting to happen today. I was hoping to spend time with Zeke, hold onto Bull for the briefest moment as he arrived to watch our little boy, then I was going to get my girls and take them home before spending way too long in a warm bath.
Pushing a baby out of my vag certainly wasn’t on the cards.
I’m not ready for this. It freaking hurt with Coby and Ryan, and it’s not as though the third is just going to slip straight out. Damn it, what was I thinking? Though luck is on my side. I’m still in the early stages, so it’s not like I can’t get myself an epidural to manage the pain.
I’ll be fine. I have Bull.
Shit, Bull! I should probably let him know that he’s about to be a daddy again.
I pull my phone out of my bag and find my recent contacts list, knowing Bull’s name would be right at the top, just as it always is. I press his name and hold the phone against my ear, impatiently waiting for him to accept the call.
“Angel, what’s going on? Is Zeke okay?” he asks as noise erupts in the background, stealing his attention away. “Faster,” he yells. “Get up that fucking ladder.”
I smile to myself. Bull has been hard at work, being the badass that we all know he is. They’ve put him in charge of testing all the new rookies and putting them through their paces, and from the sound of it, he’s doing everything in his power to make sure he gets their absolute best.
“Zeke is fine,” I tell him. “Listen ...”
“Get up there, Jones. The house is burning. There are children inside, and you want to stop for a breather? There are no fucking breathers when it comes to saving lives. Get. Up. There.”
“Bull,” I demand, needing his full attention.
I hear Jet in the background, and from how loud he sounds, he’s either right on Bull’s ass, or he’s yelling pretty fucking loud. “You think he’s going to hurl?”
“Fuck, yeah,” Bull chuckles. “Look at him. He’s either going to shit himself or puke. Either way, he’s not