of lashes in the form of detrimental, guilt-stricken thoughts.
And when there were no more tears, I finally leaned my throbbing head against the cool window and took a deep breath.
I fell into a light sleep and woke when the new day appeared on the horizon. I stretched my sore body and rubbed my tender eyes.
A choked, maniacal laugh escaped my lips when I realized where I’d spent the night.
In the parking lot of St. Mary’s Church.
Here. Here, I’ll be safe.
Chapter One
One year later
* * *
I rode the elevator to the top floor. When the steel doors opened, I rushed down the long white hallway with slate gray carpet and came to the last condo. I pounded on the light wood door for what seemed like forever.
The door to the apartment opened and Tiffany stood in front of me, all long-legged, blonde, and staring at me with glittering aquamarine eyes.
“Sterling?” she asked in shock. “Where have—I haven’t seen you—where the hell have you been?”
Without waiting for a reply, Tiffany grasped me gently around my wrist and all but hauled me into her luxury condo. She released me and then shut the door.
I clenched my cold hands into fists and looked around the room. It was an open floor plan with a modern kitchen and stainless-steel appliances, yet the living room was inviting and airy. Light gray walls matched the accent pillows on the white couch and high-end white trim carpentry highlighted the room. The last time I’d been over had been two years ago when she’d just moved in and she’d had no artwork to display. Now, expensively framed and expertly hung black and white photos brought the entire ambiance together.
I glanced at the clock on the microwave, noting the time. “Crap. I didn’t even think—I just came over. Were you asleep?”
She snorted in wry humor. “I’m a night owl.”
I nodded. “Right.”
“Sterling? What’s going on? Where have you been this past year? I’ve called and called—”
“I got a new phone number.” I pinched the bridge of my nose. “Can we sit? There’s a lot we have to—can we please sit?”
“Yeah, absolutely. Should I get a bottle of wine?”
“How about something stronger?”
“Glasses?”
“Don’t bother.”
She let out a long exhale and then went to the kitchen. Tiffany came back with a bottle of rye whiskey. Unscrewing it, she took a swig and then handed it to me.
“You look like hell,” she said, studying me carefully.
When I’d had my fill, I handed the bottle back to her.
“I haven’t had my hair cut in over a year.”
“That’s the least of it. You’ve got shadows under your eyes. Are you sleeping?”
“A few hours a night.”
She paused, holding the bottle of rye between her legs. Staring down at it, she said, “I thought you ghosted me.”
“Shit,” I muttered. “I didn’t want you to think that, but there was no way for me to explain it all to you. Now I’m here and I don’t know what to do and you’re my best friend—my only friend—and, oh fuck, I probably put you in danger just for being associated with me and…”
I grabbed the bottle from between her legs and took another fortifying sip.
“Danger? What are you talking about?” Tiffany asked.
“My mother died last year,” I said quietly.
“Violetta died? Did she have a funeral?” When I nodded, she frowned. “Why didn’t you call me? I would’ve gone with you.”
“I know.” I shot her a tiny smile. “But I—I didn’t think about it, honestly. I just kind of…went into a daze. I packed a small suitcase and drove to Kansas for the funeral.”
Her eyes were somber. “She was so young. What happened?”
I stared at my hands. The home manicure I’d given myself a few days ago was already chipped and my nails needed attention.
I lurched off the couch and began to pace across her wooden living room floor. My cheap shoulder bag rested on the end table and I reached for it and unzipped it. I felt around at the bottom of the ripped lining and dug out the letter. I hadn’t had the heart to burn it. The money had all but run out and the letter was the only thing I had left of my mother.
I showed the letter to Tiffany.
She frowned. “It’s in Italian.”
I nodded. “It explains everything, Tiff. My childhood, why we moved all the time, why she wouldn’t ever let me stay in one place too long. This explains it all.”
Her eyes were bright like glowing gemstones.
I enlightened her about the contents of the letter, including