I’ll check to make sure,” he said, sitting on his stool before sliding between her legs. “Lie back and be calm.”
“I’m pregnant,” she said slowly as his hands moved between her legs. She always felt dirty during her visit with the OB-GYN, but today, she wasn’t even worried about him. “Really pregnant?
“Yup! That means that Mena and the new baby will only be a year apart. They’ll be best friends! Hopefully, you’ll have a girl,” Lacey cheered and Kacey’s head fell to the side to look at her. Tears welled up in her eyes as the doctor stood back up, taking his gloves off.
“No IUD and everything looks good,” he said, flashing her his pearly whites.
“But I had a miscarriage before,” she said softly as she sat up, her eyes holding his.
He nodded. “And we’ll monitor you through the first trimester. I want you to come in every four weeks for ultrasounds, and if you start bleeding, please go to the ER. Yeah, it could happen again, but let’s be positive and hope not, okay?”
She bit down on her lip and nodded, her tears spilling over onto her cheeks. “There is no way to tell one way or another, right?”
He shook his head, his grin gone, a sullen look on his face. “I’m sorry. No.”
She nodded again, wiping her face. “Okay, so we’ll stay positive.”
Patting her knee, he smiled. “Exactly. See you in four weeks. Call if you have any questions.”
She hadn’t realized she said bye until the door shut and Lacey came to her side. “It’s gonna be great, no worries,” she said, smiling at Kacey extra hard. But not even Kacey could be that optimistic.
“Yeah. I hope.”
“So I saw all these supercute ideas for telling a spouse you are pregnant. We should so do one of them for Jordie. He’d love that. Are you gonna wait to tell the family until you reach the second trimester? Just in case, not saying that you should, but just in case. But I doubt you’ll have to worry about it,” she said, waving her off as she handed her her jeans.
Kacey’s heart started pounding, her chest seizing up and everything began to spin. The thought of telling everyone and them getting excited, only for her to lose it, was a heart-shattering thought. Her mother would cry for days, not only because it would be a sad situation of what-ifs but because she knew how much Kacey wanted a family. Her dad would act weird around her and act as if he couldn’t pick on her, which was very unacceptable. She’d want everyone to act the same, but she knew they wouldn’t. Not even Lacey and Karson. They wouldn’t know how to handle it. That was the light at the end of the tunnel from her first miscarriage. No one knew. Only she did, and while it wasn’t okay and she’d wanted Jordie to be there for her, she was glad that no one had had to share her pain.
And she knew she had to do it that way again.
“I’m not telling anyone,” she said, her jeans loose in her hands, her thong laying on top of them. “You can’t say anything,” she demanded, and Lacey nodded quickly.
“Not a soul.”
“Not even Mena.”
She made a face. “That’s not fair. She can’t talk.”
“I know that, but everyone is always at your house. I don’t need anyone overhearing you.”
She shrugged, and Kacey could tell she didn’t like it, but she’d do it. “Fine, put your jeans on and let me show you these things on Pinterest. I’m sure Jordie will get a kick out of it. Oh! You should go order his favorite cupcakes and have Audrey spell out on them, ‘You’re gonna be a daddy!’ He’d totally eat that up. Literally.”
But Kacey shook her head. “I’m not gonna tell him.”
Lacey’s head whipped back to her, and Kacey was surprised she didn’t give herself whiplash. “What?!” she shrieked. “Are you insane?”
“No, listen,” she said, holding her hands out. “We are already worried he can’t handle it—”
“But Kacey, if he found out you hid it from him and then lost the baby, he’d lose it. That alone would have him looking for the bottle because you didn’t include him in something life-altering. You can’t do that,” she stressed, her head shaking and her eyes wide. “Seriously. You can’t. You have to tell him. I get not telling the family, but you have to tell Jordie.”