She nodded, looking back up at him. “Just really tired and I miss you.”
“I miss you more,” he promised, holding the phone closer. “Show me some boob.”
“Jordie!” she scolded and he laughed as she fought her grin. When she pulled her shirt up suddenly, both her tits on the screen, he slowly nodded his head.
“Mm, can’t wait to get home.”
“Me either,” she said, her eyes watering up, and that surprised him.
“You’re being weird.”
“I don’t like being away from you,” she said as a tear slowly fell. “Are you okay?”
He nodded. “I’m fine.”
“Going to your AA meetings?”
“I went to one yesterday, and I’ll go again tomorrow. Might make Benji go with me. Roommate bonding and shit,” he said and Benji nodded as Kacey smiled.
“Good, the email didn’t bother you too much, did it?”
He shrugged. “Kinda, but nothing I can’t handle.”
She worked her lip, letting out a long breath. “Okay, well, call me if you need me. I’m dead on my feet.”
He nodded. “Okay, baby, I’ll call you in the morning. I’m gonna finish my dinner and start Game of Thrones with Benji.”
She grinned. “Sounds like fun, talk to you tomorrow then.”
“Love you.”
“Love you more,” she said, and she waved before the screen went black and she was gone. Something really did seem off, but he wasn’t sure what it was. It was hard to push for info when they were so far apart. He was ready to get home, but he still had five days before he would be able to.
“You’re lucky to have her,” Benji said from his bed, pausing the TV.
“I know,” Jordie agreed.
“And she obviously loves you,” he said slowly and Jordie nodded.
“Yeah, she does, as do I.”
“Then don’t let your mom fuck it up,” he said sternly. “Let her go because she will ruin you, dude.”
“It’s harder than it sounds,” he said slowly, but Benji shook his head.
“It’s not. Look deep inside of you, and if you can write down three reasons why you need to keep her, then do it. But if you can’t, then let her go,” he said before opening the drawer in the side table and grabbing a pen and paper. Throwing them to Jordie, he said, “And if you can find three reasons to keep her, make a list of the things that need to change, and then give them to her. If she can’t change them, let her go.”
Jordie looked down at the piece of paper and then back at Benji. “Seriously?”
He nodded. “I have so many lists that I make for every person I form a relationship with. It’s something Richie taught me, and it’s worked for me.”
“So I have a list on me?”
Benji grinned as he shrugged. “Yeah, and you made the cut.”
Jordie shot him back a grin as he reached for the pen. Looking up to see if Benji was watching him, he found that he wasn’t. He was watching TV, and when Jordie looked back down, he sucked in a breath.
He could do this. His pencil shook as he wrote, but even he didn’t believe what he wrote. Or at least he thought the reasons meant enough to go through the pain she put him through.
I love her.
She gave me life.
Staring at the piece of the paper, he smacked his pen to it and shook his head. He couldn’t come up with a three. Staring at the paper, he read one and two again, and then slowly crossed out one. He didn’t love her. He couldn’t. She gave him no reason to love her. Before, he’d told himself it was love. But really, that was because he was a kid and she was all he knew. He didn’t have a dad, didn’t have someone who could show him love. But then he met Karson, his family, and ultimately, Kacey.
Because of them, he knew real love—true, undeniable love.
The kind of love that people die for.
And Stacey Thomas did not deserve that love.
Especially not from him.
Holding the puck behind the Stars’ net, Jordie looked to Karson, who was watching with him, waiting for the puck. An offenseman was waiting for him to go but, acting as if he was going to pass it, he deked it to the other side, going around the net, sending it hard up to Erik who was waiting at the line. As he carried it into the zone, Jordie skated hard to catch up, crossing the blue line with Karson. As Karson shot, it was knocked away. Anderson and Titov fought for