“Well, yes, it’s a huge factor for us. We do love sex.”
She smiled, her body breaking out in gooseflesh. “You are correct, but I don’t think that’s an issue. Karson is getting older, his eyesight is going,” she teased and he laughed.
“Okay, if that’s the house you want, it’s the one we’ll get.”
“You sure?” she asked, biting her lip.
“If it makes you happy, yes. I told you, I don’t care as long as we are together.”
Her face broke into a grin. “Okay, well, I can throw in maybe a grand on the price.”
He smiled, cupping her chin. “Do you want it then, or do we need to go back and look?”
“No, I could tell you everything about it. I want it.”
“Then give me your thousand bucks, and let’s go buy it.”
He kissed her nose and she smacked his chest before hugging him close as her heart went wild. The last two weeks while they had looked, she almost didn’t believe it was happening. But as he talked to Jamie about the house and what they needed to do, she dug her nails into her arms, waiting to wake up.
But she didn’t.
They were really doing this.
Her happily ever after was happening.
“What is one of your biggest regrets, Jordie?”
Kacey crossed her legs and glanced over at Jordie as he leaned on his thighs, looking over at his therapist, Julie, and chewing on his lip. Folding her hands in her lap, she watched as his gaze flickered to her and then back to Julie. This was the second therapy session she had sat in on, and she was still as nervous as the first time she came. In the AA group, he was more laid-back and chill as he shared his daily struggles. But in therapy, it was different. He was closed off, he moved his hands continually, and he couldn’t sit still. It made her stomach hurt watching him so uncomfortable.
She wanted to ease his concerns and fix him, but this was his time. She was there for support and that was all.
“I have two,” he said roughly, looking over at Julie. “One is losing Robbie and the other is pushing Kacey away.”
She nodded as Kacey held her breath, tucking her hands between his thighs. She knew she was one of them, but the way he said it was like a knife in her belly.
“Why is that?”
He leaned back, his chest rising and falling as he shrugged. “I hate knowing that someone was killed trying to protect me,” he said softly. “It’s been years, almost thirteen, but I can still see the blood, still see his eyes go blank, and still hear my screams as I tried to shake him back to life.”
“Can you talk about what happened?”
Kacey looked down, sucking in a breath. She knew this story, knew it well because Jordie still held so much guilt from the whole thing. He had only talked twice about it, but both those times had ended with him wrapped in a ball, her body covering his.
“I was dating a girl that I really thought I was in love with, but Robbie never liked her. He said she was too rich. And since we were poor, he thought it was a little weird. But I was hot and, of course, she’d like me,” he said and Kacey shook her head. He tried so hard to hide his pain with humor, but when she glanced up, Julie wasn’t smiling. She was watching him intensely as he looked back down, sensing that his joke hadn’t gone over well. “Um, well, one night, after we got done having sex, we were talking, and I told her what happened to me from one of my stepdads.”
“Why?”
Kacey looked up then because she had always wondered that. Why did he tell her?
“’Cause I wanted someone to care, to be sad with me.” Kacey’s heart sank as she reached out, lacing her fingers with his. “I just hated myself, thought it was my fault, and I wanted someone to make me feel differently.”
“Did it work?” Julie asked.
“No, she looked freaked out by it all, but I joked it off and that was it,” he said, sitting up again and holding Kacey’s hand. “The next day, she went to school and told everyone that I had sex with one of my stepdads. Left out a lot of what I’d said and turned it into me being gay instead of me being a victim.”