I kidding? I was a racehorse being pulled out and put on display so the guests could get a good look at the merchandise. It was my job here, and forgetting that was stupid.
Parker nervously filled the silence with more rambling. “No, I think a nice pair of trousers and a button-down shirt would work. If you’d like, I’d be happy to provide you with—”
“I told you I had proper clothes.” I rolled my tense shoulders and glanced at my closet. The thought of putting them on made my skin tighten. “Don’t you worry your pretty little head. I won’t embarrass you.”
“You are determined to be in a foul mood over this, aren’t you?”
“Let’s just say the only woman allowed to pick out my clothes was my mother, and that stopped when I was seven.”
“Fine. Moving on, we need to get our stories straight about how we met. I was going to discuss this with you on Saturday, but …”
She trailed off with a strangled sound. And I found myself smiling again.
“I distracted you, didn’t I?”
She didn’t say a thing. Because we both knew it was true.
“How did we meet?” she asked. “I can’t quite figure out what to say that will be believable.”
“Because the idea of us makes absolutely no sense?” I offered lightly. I mean, I could have been insulted, but she was right—we didn’t make sense.
“Yes.” She sighed. “I’m not very good at acting.”
She sounded so forlorn, I was almost sorry for her.
“My mom once told me that love doesn’t make sense.” As soon as I said the words, I winced, feeling like a sentimental fool. I was never sentimental. But I pushed on. “Falling for someone isn’t about logic. It’s chemistry.”
She was quiet for a second. When she answered, she sounded softer than before. “That’s … well, that’s surprisingly romantic.”
Don’t go there, honey.
“Yeah, well, it’s a good line of attack. I’ll tell them …” I rubbed my neck and stared out the grimy window where the sun shone down on the black tar rooftops. “I’ll tell them I was on my way to meet my brother for a drink.”
She snorted loudly.
I bit back a grin. “I was late and in a hurry so I wasn’t watching where I was going. You were walking out of the door. I was going in. We collided. And there I was, my hands full of this irate little pixie with the prettiest brown eyes I’d ever seen. How could I resist? So I asked you to join me for a drink to make up for nearly plowing you down. But it was just an excuse because I knew I’d be a fool to let this gorgeous uptown girl walk out of my life without at least trying to get to know her first.”
Utter silence met me on the other side of the line. It was so quiet, I could hear a morning news program playing on her end. An uncomfortable flush worked its way up my chest. This is why I didn’t talk too much.
“Parker? You there?”
She made a noise in the back of her throat, as if she were choking. “Yes. Yes. I’m here. Sorry.”
“Well? What do you think? Will that pass muster?”
Silence greeted me again and I swore I heard her mutter “fiddlesticks.” But then she answered crisp as new bed sheets. “Yes. That’s … good. Perfectly adequate.”
Perfectly adequate? Well, hell. I thought I’d done all right. It had been kind of sappy, sure, but I couldn’t see anyone not believing it.
She cleared her throat and charged on. “The party starts at seven thirty. Boston Harbor. We could meet—”
“I do not meet my women for dates. I pick them up. Always.”
“Morgan,” she said with asperity, “I am not your woman.”
She couldn’t see my grin, but it didn’t stop me. “Tinker Bell, I have a contract that says otherwise. Better get used to it. I’ll pick you up at seven.”
“Sand snakes,” she snarled under her breath.
Whatever that meant.
“Oh, and Tink?”
“What?” Another snarl. Such joy and light from my irate pixie.
“Prepare yourself for some physical contact. Because I touch my woman. Always.”
“I know what you’re trying to do.”
I paused, my hand hovering near the small of Parker’s back as she halted on the sidewalk outside her apartment. “What am I trying to do?”
I honestly didn’t have a frickin’ clue what she was thinking. Hell, I was trying my best not to look too closely at her. If I did, I might not stop. Parker wasn’t dressed like any of my