Angel led him to the edge of a drop off, and they looked down. The sparkling water of the river raced along.
Cole had to admit, it was something to see. “You tubed down this thing?” he asked, amazed.
She nodded. “The water’s still pretty high this time of year. It comes down from the mountain snowmelts. This is the run off. It’s not safe to tube down now, but in the summer it’s pretty calm waters.”
His gaze traveled over the landscape. There were high bluffs on the other side of the river. It looked like something out of a western. He half expected to see an Indian sitting on a horse, high above them. He looked up, and spotted a hawk soaring high over the river.
Angel walked over to a boulder, and sat down.
Cole followed, sitting next to her.
They were quiet for a few minutes, taking it all in, enjoying the sound of the river.
Angel looked over at Cole. “Why do you suppose Natalie was so insistent that we spend the day together?”
Cole looked off, squinting into the horizon. “I guess she thought you needed a break, like she said.” And she probably wants me to tell you what I’ve been putting off, he thought to himself.
“Yeah. I guess I did.”
Could he bring himself to do it? Was now as good a time as any? He looked over at her. He knew everything would change between them the minute he told her.
She smiled up at him. “Have I told you how happy I am that you’re here?”
He smiled back at her. “I think you may have mentioned it.”
“It means a lot to me, having you here to lean on.”
“I told you, that you wouldn’t have to go through this alone. I meant it.”
She nodded. “I know. Her gaze dropped to his mouth. A moment later she leaned in, and kissed him.
He pulled back, looking at her. “You know I care about you, right?”
She smiled. “Yes. Why?”
He looked off into the distance. “Where do you see this going?” he asked.
The smile faded from her face. “What do you mean?”
He looked back at her. “Us. What do you see happening? What do you want?”
She looked away, confused. “I don’t know what you’re asking.”
“Yes, you do. Tell me. Do you want to marry me? Is that it?”
“What?”
“Is that what you want?”
“Are you asking me? This doesn’t quite sound like a proposal.”
“Is that what you want?”
“I don’t know.”
“Do you really see us having a life together?”
“You ask that like it’s impossible. Like I shouldn’t want that.”
“Maybe because I don’t see how you could want a life with someone like me.” He found himself wondering if he was picking a fight with her so that he wouldn’t have to tell her or so it’d be easier to tell her.
“Why do you always do that?” she asked, her tone changing, becoming annoyed.
“Do what?” he snapped back.
“Qualify it. Instead of saying ‘a life with me’, you say ‘a life with someone like me’.
He shook his head. “Whatever. Let’s go.” He stood up, and started walking back to the bike.
She ran after him, grabbing his arm, and turning him back around. “You said all that because you think I’m expecting more from you than you’re ready to give. You’re wrong.”
“Wrong? Which part? You gonna stand there, and tell me you don’t expect anything from me? That’s bullshit, and we both know it.” He yanked his arm out of her grasp, and started walking toward the bike.
“Do you love me?”
That stopped him in his tracks. He paused, but didn’t turn around.
She came to stand in front of him, looking up into his face. “Do you love me?” she repeated.
He looked down into her eyes, knowing he couldn’t deny it to her. He nodded. “Yes.”
“That’s all I need to know,” she whispered.
No, it’s not, he thought to himself. He knew he had to tell her. The words were stuck in his throat, and then she was kissing him, and he forgot all about telling her.
They stood there, in the hot Arizona sun, with a hawk soaring above their heads, and kissed like young lovers that had snuck off to meet in secret.
When they finally came up for air, they were both breathing hard. Without thinking about how insane this was, he pulled her down on the ground, pushing her onto her back, and she let him. He lay on top of her, kissing her endlessly. His mouth trailed across her jaw to her ear. He whispered to her, “I want to