Opposites Attract - Jessica Prince Page 0,12

room, returning seconds later with the Bose sound dock. I watched as she hooked her iPhone up to it and scrolled through her playlist. “That bastard thinks he can have loud sex without repercussions, he’s got another thing coming.” Suddenly, Fall Out Boy’s “My Songs Know What You Did in The Dark” started blaring from the speakers and Devon looked at me with an evil smile and started singing the lyrics at the top of her lungs.

By the time the first chorus started, I’d joined in, jumping up and down on the bed and screaming, “Light ‘em up, up, up. I’M ON FIRE!” About halfway though, we’d forgotten the whole purpose of our impromptu sing along and did what we always did when a song we loved started playing. We got lost in the music, singing and dancing for all we were worth.

There was a reason BJ dance parties were so famous in our apartment, after all.

We were only about two minutes in when a sudden pounding on the front door caused us to freeze in place, eyes wide.

“Oh, balls,” Devon gasped, clearly not having thought her revenge plan through all the way. She scrambled for the sound dock and silenced the music. I, however, had just enough booze in my system to make me feel ten feet tall and bullet proof. Side note: tequila and I were a terrible combination. I’d had a shit day, all because of a stupid guy, and I was suddenly in the mood to take my man-hate out on our dick-head of a neighbor by ripping him a new asshole.

I jumped off the bed and charged for the door, Devon hot on my heels. I reached for the knob and jerked it open, shouting, “You’ve got some nerve, you son of a—” My words lodged in my throat when I got a look at the enraged man standing on the other side of the threshold.

I KNEW THE MINUTE I got her home that I’d made a huge mistake.

Admittedly, I’d been more than a little drunk when I decided on the girl who was going to help me with my little… issue, but the second she started making those weird hyena noises I’d lost my buzz, along any hopes at getting a hard on.

“Oh, yeah!” she cried out as she writhed underneath me. Now, normally a woman panting and moaning like I was a sex God would have been a major boost for my ego. The problem was all we’d done so far was a bit of heavy making out on my bed. And other than the shirt she’d ripped off of me as soon as the door closed (and it was a perfectly good shirt, too), we were still fully clothed.

I did my best to ignore her ear-splitting mewls as I slid my lips down her neck and made the mistake of placing an open-mouth kiss against her skin. She was wearing so much perfume I could actually taste it. The bitter flavor coated my tongue, making it impossible to continue on with my seduction. Trying to be as discreet as possible, I turned my head so she wouldn’t see me gag.

Unbeknownst to the fact her perfume just burned off all my taste buds, the woman continued to jerk and twist beneath me, banging my headboard against the wall as she made noises that sounded an awful lot like a cat that just had an unfortunate run-in with a street sweeper… and lost.

Get your head in the game, Locklaine, I mentally chided, pushing up just enough to pull her shirt over her head. Okay, I thought with a smile as I stared down at her abundant rack encased in deep purple lace, I can work with this.

“Like what you see?” the woman asked in what I could only assume was supposed to be a seductive voice and not a cringe-inducing, nasally whine. Choosing not to answer in fear it would only make her talk more, I buried my face in her cleavage, only to inhale her noxious perfume and start choking. She began to flail and shout like my near death was pushing her to the brink of orgasm when I was overcome with the sudden urge to jump from the bed and drag the woman whose name I couldn’t remember out the door and slam it in her face.

Why women thought men actually wanted their women to sound like low-quality porn stars was beyond me. I’d rather my partner have a quiet, body-locking