at one of the little corner tables in the back of the cafeteria. Colton began talking, “I’m not going to push—”
Chris snorted in disbelief.
Colton just scowled. “I’m not, but I get the feeling that everything you have going on in here,” he tapped the side of Chris’s head, “has something to do with that girl upstairs. I was in that truck with you. I heard what she said to you when we brought her in. You wouldn’t leave her for days while she was unconscious, but now we find you running out of here like there are a bunch of wolves on your tail when she’s finally awake. What’s going on, Chris? Something has you rattled.” He examined Chris for a moment, as if waiting to see if he’d speak. “I’m not going to force this, but you know I’m here if you want to talk about it. I think I’ve figured out a bit over the last few months, but you could fill in the holes and maybe get it all off your chest at the same time.”
Chris’s stomach spun. Would it help to talk about it? Maybe having another perspective on all the events would clear it up, even if it was only in his mind.
“I’m guessing that something happened between Julie and you before you deployed…” Colton led.
Chris knew his eyes widened. He hadn’t realized he’d given so much away. He swallowed the rocks in his throat. “Yeah, it did.” He closed his eyes. It was so hard to think about that weekend now. That was all that kept him alive for six months, but now the perfection of that weekend was almost too painful to think about.
“When I found out I was deploying, I had forty-eight hours. I came home to see Cassie before I left, but she had left town unexpectedly. Julie was staying in her house because they were redoing her kitchen. One thing led to another, and yeah, there’s some history there.”
“But you were deploying, so how did you leave things between you?”
Chris frowned down at his coffee cup. “I promised her I’d come back safe. I didn’t keep that promise and she met Aaron.”
Colton nodded slowly and Chris could see his brain spinning while he considered the events of the past year. “So what happened Monday to send you into a tailspin?”
Chris rubbed a hand up over his face, and then began to rub his knee. He glanced around the bustling cafeteria, wondering how many people in here were hiding secrets. He really didn’t want to talk about this, with anyone, but maybe it would help to get it out. Colton already knew bits of it.
“Chris?”
“Sorry,” he cleared his throat. “So Monday, I had an appointment with my urologist and nothing’s getting better.” Chris quickly glanced to check Colton’s expression, but he was thankfully keeping it clear of pity.
“In fact, the prognosis isn’t so great.” He plowed on just wanting to get it all out at this point. Like pulling off a band aid. He’d just ignore that he was ripping that sucker directly off his abused balls. “Unless there’s a miracle, this is the way things will stay. My only option is to do some sort of plastic or reconstructive surgery.” He gave a brittle laugh. “Even with that, the odds aren’t real great that things will ever be normal again. The good news is I won’t have to ever worry about making my wife have morning sickness because without a miracle that isn’t even possible anymore.” He closed his eyes and rested his head in his hands. Then he reached out with shaking hands to take a long, scalding drink of his coffee.
“So that’s my story. Sorry that you had to deal with my sorry ass Monday, especially when you do have a gorgeous lady at home who needs you because she is dealing with morning sickness. I’m really sorry, Colt. I let you and Penelope and Julie down, again, and I’m sorry.”
Colton reached across and squeezed his shoulder. “You don’t have to apologize for being human, Chris. I know this sucks and isn’t what you wanted to hear. I wish the prognosis was better, but damn, I can’t be sorry about any of the rest of it. I thank God every day that you’re still here with us. I know there are days when you don’t feel the same way.” Colton paused, showing way more emotion and love than Chris was used to seeing from his big brother. “Maybe