Open Your Heart (Kings Grove #4) - Delancey Stewart Page 0,60

between us. “Curse?”

I sighed. I didn’t want to talk about this. “Yeah,” I admitted. “A little bit. But…” I looked down at Matilda’s dark head and tried to imagine giving her away now. It would have ripped my heart out. It would have felt a lot like… like it felt watching Harper leave yesterday. “Maybe I’m ready to be a little bit selfish. I’d miss her too much.”

“Maybe loving someone isn’t selfish,” Maddie said softly, and her eyes across the fire suggested she didn’t mean Matilda.

“I think maybe it’s the most selfish thing you can do,” I countered. “Especially if you loving them changes their plans.”

Connor frowned at me, clearly missing the subtext. “What kind of plans you figure Matilda might have?” Maddie reached out and swatted his arm.

We were silent then, letting the warm night settle around us for a while, the forest whispering high above our heads as the high winds moved through the treetops.

Number three finally became too much for Maddie, and she took her back inside and then came out and sat down.

“We’ve got the plans all worked up for filming the movie,” I told her. “Tuck and I are going to get started on some of the background shots this week, at the Inn and out in the grove.”

Maddie grinned. “Can I come with?”

Connor took her hand and leaned forward to kiss it. “Let them do their jobs,” he suggested. “You’re adorable, but you’re bossy. Cam knows what he’s doing.”

I did, and it felt good to acknowledge it. “Tuck is one of the best cameramen I’ve ever worked with,” I assured her. “And you’ll be surprised how well Harper put the scenes together.” I’d been surprised, at least. She had a real knack for the way a film should flow and move to tell a story. One more talent. One more thing to admire about her.

“When she gets back are you finally going to do something about all this?” Maddie asked.

“Yeah, we’re going to get started making the movie. I just said that.” I scowled, hoping she’d leave it at that and let me ignore what she really meant.

She frowned at me, but she let it go.

A little while later, Connor and Maddie rose and said goodnight.

“Think about things,” Maddie suggested as I hugged her close. “Think about what really matters to you, Cam. And fight for it.”

I shook my head into her thick hair, a rush of conflicting emotions choking me up unexpectedly. “I’ll try,” I told her.

“Good night, brother.” Connor slapped my hand and we shook, and then I watched them walk slowly away, Matilda standing at my side.

“Come on girl,” I said. “Let’s go in.” I had to bring the pups out to the pen once more that night before we could all settle in, and once everyone was ready, I turned out the lights and got into bed. I didn’t feel happy, but my life—with the dogs and the big house occupied—felt much more real than it had a few months ago. I’d been mostly a ghost, I realized. And the thing about floating through life as a ghost was that while it was definitely devoid of any real pain, it was also absent of joy. Feeling one seemed to mean feeling the other, and I wondered, now that I felt both, if I’d ever go back.

Tuck came back the next day and showed up at my house with his camera, ready to work. I stood in the door for a moment after he knocked, swallowing down my jealousy and my questions, and then I let him in.

“Dust is going to be an issue up here,” he said, shaking his head. “It reminds me of that shoot out toward Death Valley. The future western thing?”

I laughed. “I remember that one. Weren’t you hooking up with the Mae West character?”

“What I do in my free time is not your business,” he said, pretending to be offended. “After all, I’m not quizzing you about what you’ve been doing in your off time, am I?” he wiggled his eyebrows and it was obvious he was talking about his room mate.

I blew out a frustrated breath. It’d be easier to just talk about Harper and get the topic out of the way than it would be to endure suggestive questions the whole day. “Nothing’s been happening there for weeks,” I said. “Actually kind of thought maybe you’d been—“

“I’ll cut you off right there,” Tuck said. “It was clear there was something between you when I