One Night Stand-In (Boyfriend Material #3) - Lauren Blakely Page 0,56
second Lucas’s idea, but have no clue what might motivate the man behind the breakup letter.
“I think he’s enjoying it.” The conductor calls out All aboard, and Lucas turns to me. “And I am too. I’m not just doing it to help my brother.”
My heart rises to my throat. “Why are you doing it, then?”
He takes my hand again and threads his fingers with mine, sending shivers all through my body. When our eyes meet, a flash of vulnerability crosses his. “If you’d asked me yesterday, I’d have said you were the last partner I’d want for this sort of hunt. But now I think you’re the only person I’d want to do this with.”
With those words—the only person—a flash of understanding fills me.
In this moment, away from the city, far away from the hustle of my daily life, and so very far away from my family, I can see myself more clearly.
I’ve put on twenty-twenty glasses for the first time in years, and I can make out something I should have seen years ago.
How I’ve avoided love.
Hidden from it.
Run the other way.
Because years ago, I fell for this man. He’s the only person I’ve fallen for, even partway.
For the first time in my life, I’d felt something deep in my heart. Something terrifying to me—a hope, an ache for another person.
That was what hurt so much when he didn’t show up that night. Hurt so much that I shut the door on my heart.
I shut it to apologies. Shut it to him. Shut it to the dangerous power of falling in love.
At the time, I could barely comprehend what all those foreign feelings were, or how hurt could get so mixed up with fear that you cut yourself off from something good just to avoid repeating something bad.
I didn’t just lose my friendship with Lucas.
I lost my first and—as it turned out—my only shot so far at falling in love.
Trouble is, I don’t know how the hell to deal with that now. I can’t even look at him because I’m afraid I’ve become a see-through woman.
Instead, I rest my head on his shoulder and speak another truth, if a partial one. “It’s the same for me.”
21
Lucas
The tango club sign says Back in an hour.
I’ve never been happier to have to wait.
More time with Lola. “Are you hungry?”
“Famished.” She leans her nose to her shirt. “But I also smell like a farm. I could seriously go for a shower.”
The corner of my mouth curves up as my buddy and I formulate a quick plan. “I’m only ten blocks from here.”
One eyebrow lifts. “Is that so?”
I shrug ever so casually. “I’m just saying. You could get on a subway and go all the way across town to Chelsea, dealing with Saturday evening crowds and the perils of underground travel.” I shudder, selling it to the jury. “Or you could zip right on over to my place and be spick-and-span in no time.”
She hums as if she’s considering the options. “That’s quite a picture you paint of subway horrors.”
“It’s terrible this time of day. Clowns roaming free and whatnot. It’s really best avoided. Plus, it takes forever, and then you’d smell like a llama longer. Lots to consider, Dumont.”
She shoots me a dubious look. “I thought you liked llamas.”
“Love them. But llama smell?” I shake my head. “It needs to be dealt with stat.”
“I believe that would apply to you too.”
“Absolutely.”
Wrinkling her nose, she leans in close, sniffing my shirt. “What’s this fragrance?” she says. “Do I detect notes of hay? With a hint of fur?”
“Yes, I’m wearing eau de barn as well. Which means there’s only one answer.”
Ten minutes later, the door to the elevator closes, and we shoot up through my building.
She flashes me a knowing grin. “This is just a shower, right?”
“What else could it possibly be?” I say, flirty too.
With a playful eyebrow wiggle, she says, “You tell me.”
“Of course it’s just a shower. A shower at my place. Besides, you said sex doesn’t change a thing,” I point out with a smirk.
“Ah. So there’s going to be sex in the shower?”
I raise my hands, like I’m shocked. “Whoa. Who said anything about a group shower?”
She clasps her hand to her chest. “Oh, right. My bad. Of course you invited me over for a solo shower.”
I lift my chin. “Exactly. I’m only concerned about my olfactory senses.”
When the door opens on my floor, she exits first. “In that case, I’ll make sure your nose doesn’t suffer.”