soon as I hung up, I started pacing around the apartment. Fucking hell, I couldn’t stand being inside here until two o’clock. It was barely ten now.
I didn’t have a game plan, but I needed to get out. Stat.
The second I left my building I knew what my destination was: the hospital. Why, I had no idea. I couldn’t exactly storm inside and throw her over my shoulder, even though the thought was tempting.
I went to the back, where I’d waited for Laney the first time I saw her back in New York, sitting under the shade of the huge oak tree. I was just going to wait here until two o’clock.
Last night, I might have wanted to forget everything—needed it, even—but today, I wanted the opposite. It wasn’t in my nature to run from anything. I took challenges head-on, doing whatever was needed to come out on the other side.
The pity party was over. One evening had been enough. Today, I was in winning mode.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Laney
I drew in a deep breath as I stepped in the cafeteria. My legs were a little wobbly. My back was hurting. This had been a long shift. After the surgery with the chief yesterday, I had to take over for a colleague who was sick. I ended up sleeping most of the night here, but this morning, I’d had to go straight into another surgery. Chief had been happy with me yesterday.
I bought a chocolate croissant and an espresso and was now sitting at my favorite table in the corner, right next to the window.
I kept glancing at the clock, willing it to turn to two so I could leave. I’d spent all of last evening trying to convince someone to take today’s shift, but I’d been unsuccessful.
My heart was heavy, my hands jittery.
Now that I didn’t have a surgery to demand my entire focus, I couldn’t stop thinking about Cole.
I needed to talk to him. My heart was breaking just remembering the anguish in his eyes yesterday. He didn’t deserve that, and I had to set things straight. Biting my lower lip, I glanced out the window at the spot where he usually waited for me after a shift.
HOLY SHIT.
Was that Cole under the tree?
I blinked rapidly, standing up so quickly that I pushed the table forward a few inches. It made a screeching sound.
With an apologetic grin at the other patrons, I darted outside, leaving my half-eaten croissant and untouched espresso behind.
I only had fifteen minutes until the mandatory afternoon meeting, but I planned to make the most of it. My heartbeat intensified with every step. My legs felt lighter; my whole body did. I took in Cole as I approached him. He hadn’t seen me yet. Sitting on the bench, he was staring at the small fountain in front of the entrance. He looked freshly shaved, and to the untrained eye, he seemed his usual self. He definitely was wearing one of his ready-to-take-on-the-world suits.
But he was a little pale, and I detected a few creases in his brow that were very unlike him. God, I loved this man. So, so much. I didn’t want him to hurt, least of all because of me. He was too wonderful to deserve that.
“Hey,” I said, then I realized it came out stifled because my throat was clogged. There were so many emotions bubbling up inside me.
Clearing my throat, I tried again. “Cole.”
He snapped his head in my direction the next second, rising from the bench.
“Since when are you here?” I asked at the same time he said, “I couldn’t wait at home, so I just came here.”
I beamed, putting a hand on my belly, suddenly feeling self-conscious. I was in my scrubs, my hair still twisted in the strict bun I always wore during surgeries. I reeked of disinfectant. Cole didn’t seem to care about any of those things. He just watched me intently, without saying one word. I felt my heartbeat in my throat. I knew I was the one who needed to talk. Stepping closer, I took his hands in mine, looking down at them, my grip tight.
“I am deeply sorry that you’re hurting. That you had all that on your chest. I love you, but you already know that. Seeing that white dress in the picture made me nervous, but in a good way. Cole, I can see myself with you in ten, twenty, thirty years. You’re my future. I didn’t... I didn’t think I could feel this way