Oh Lord, Help Me Keep My Panties on - By Lynda Burton Page 0,28

Toni stated that she was fed up with his shit and wanted to get away. So she booked us a three-thirty flight to Nassau, Bahamas. I looked at the phone and then asked her to repeat what she had just said. “Girl, you’re going to the Bahamas for the weekend, so get your shit and let’s go. I already paid for your tickets, just meet me at the airport at three o’clock. Don’t be late; we’re boarding at three-forty-five sharp.” Then she hung up. Oh shit! I looked at my coworker, then my watch. Damn, it was 1:30 PM! I had to drive from my office in upper Manhattan to Long Island and then back to LaGuardia airport by three o’clock, shit! I grabbed my bag, then grabbed my coworker’s hand, and ran back to the office. We ran into the building, waving our security IDs at the guards, and made a mad dash for the stairs. We jumped into my car and made our way to the bridge. The faster I tried to drive, the slower the traffic went. Oh my god, was I going to make it? It took me almost an hour to get home. I pulled into the drive way on two wheels, jumped out the car, and ran to the front door in a panic. Once in the house, I ran to my safe, seventeen—right, thirty-nine left, nine—right! Shit! What’s the damn combination! It took me almost three minutes to get the damn thing open. I grabbed my passport and ran back to the car. I had thirty minutes to get to the airport and fifty-five minutes till take off. Lynn held on for dear life as I zipped in and out of traffic. I drove my car like my life depended on it, and it did. When we arrived at the airport twenty-two minutes later; Lynn was clearly shaken and sweating. I took my house keys off the ring, leaving the key to the ignition, and jumped out of the car. “It’s yours for the weekend if you want to drive it,” I said to Lynn.

That’s when it hit me! I don’t have any fucking luggage! No toothbrush, no underwear, no nothing! At that same moment I looked up and saw Toni walking toward me with a big smile on her face. I introduced her to Lynn and then turned to her with tears in my eyes. I didn’t have time to pack, I don’t have any clothes! Toni looked at me and gave me a big hug and said, “Don’t worry; I got you covered for the whole weekend.” She grabbed my arm, and we ran through the terminal like wild children. We had less than ten minutes to get our electronic tickets, get past the airport security metal detectors, and board our plane. We were going to make it! We were sweaty from all the running when we reached the gate. As we stepped on to the plane I remembered my fur-child Hobbs. So I used the phone when we were airborne to call Sean, to see if he would take care of Hobbs for the weekend. Sean laughed when I told him about the last-minute trip. He agreed to stay at the house and take care of Hobbs. He also agreed to call Dawn and Nia and let them know that I was in the Bahamas.

Toni and I talked and giggled as we sipped on our drinks. Then Toni surprised me and said, “Well, Haley, I know that I put you on the spot by calling you at the last minute, and I know you didn’t have time to pack. So I stopped by the bank, and made a little withdrawal. The only problem we might have is finding a hotel! Neither one of us made reservations, so we have to find one when we get there! I’ve never been here before, and I don’t know where we’re going to stay, but I don’t think that will be a problem. With that, Toni opened up her purse and showed me that her pocketbook was full of $100 bills, fifty of them in fact. I almost choked on my drink, and spilt the rest in my lap! “What the hell!” I said, all excited. “Shhhhh . . . Look girl, don’t say a thing, just enjoy the trip. Besides, I said I got you!” Toni said as she looked at me with a devilish grin and closed her eyes. Once the plane

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