No Stranger to Scandal - By Rachel Bailey Page 0,58
to the edges of the counter for support.
“Hayden,” she said, then swallowed. “I’m sorry about what I said the other night. I was upset.”
His features seemed carefully schooled to give nothing away. “It wasn’t anything you said, Lucy. I need to go.”
“Before the investigation is finished?”
“It’s for the best. I’ve become too involved. One of the top investigators in my company, John Harris, will be here by tonight. He’ll be more impartial, which is what the investigation needs now.” He frowned and looked down at Josh, who was petting Rosie. “What it always needed.”
“And you’re leaving D.C.?” She’d known this moment was coming, of course she had, but please not yet. She wasn’t ready.
He nodded and a muscle jumped in his jaw. “The flight to New York is in a couple of hours. Our bags are packed.”
She sucked in a breath and ignored the ache in her chest. There was no chance of a future for them—and if she’d had any doubts about that, he’d settled them at her aunt’s lodge in Montana—so maybe he was right to leave now. Only ten minutes ago she’d been thinking that things between them were probably too tainted to survive even their fling with all its rules. Perhaps they’d even make things worse if they didn’t make a clean break now. Wanting a little more time with him was simply the desperate need of a woman in love who was in denial about the future she couldn’t have.
She lifted her chin and found a polite smile, determined to see him off with at least that civility. “Thank you for dropping by to say goodbye.”
He speared his fingers through his hair and held them there, gripping tight for a long moment before dropping his hands to his sides. “Damn it, I hate this formality between us.”
“We can’t have it both ways, Hayden. This was only ever temporary.” A blanket of calm descended to smother the tumultuous emotions that had been battering her. Acceptance. It wouldn’t last long, she knew, but she was grateful for its appearance now. “Thanks for organizing Graham’s deal to keep Angelica’s name out of the hearings. I want to see justice catch up with her, but I know Graham would have hated himself if it had come via him.”
Hayden nodded but seemed distracted. “It was a good deal for us—he gave a full and frank confession, and he named names like Marnie Salloway. We’ll catch Angelica. The deal was only to keep her name out of Graham’s interview. Now that that’s over, all bets are off.”
“But it won’t be you who catches her,” she said softly.
“No.” He lifted his broad shoulders in a shrug. “John Harris will work the case. But I’ll keep an eye on it from the New York office.”
The casual way he was talking about leaving grated on her nerves. “So you’re walking away.”
“I’m taking my son home,” he said pointedly. “It’s the right thing to do.”
“Is it so easy to leave me?” As soon as she said the words, she wanted to snatch them back. Pointlessly, she covered her mouth with two fingers, as if that could help. Where had that acceptance gone?
His eyes flashed fire. “Hell, this isn’t even close to easy, Lucy. But yes, I’m leaving.” He held one palm out, as if in surrender. “I can’t give you what you need.”
The words were like a match to tinder—all those turbulent emotions that had been roiling inside her finally had a reason to coalesce. “Who are you to tell me what I need?” she demanded.
“I’ll tell you what I know,” he said in measured tones. “I’m cynical and world-weary. A jaded widower. I know I’ll never love with an open and unguarded heart, or with the intensity that I once did. My heart simply isn’t capable of it—it’s like an old, beaten-up, secondhand car. You deserve someone full of life. Optimism. Verve. Like you.”
An ironic laugh bubbled up from deep down, but died before it reached her lips. He was telling her what she needed again. And he’d never been more wrong. Suddenly she saw everything clearly, maybe for the first time. Her love wasn’t tainted—it just had some obstacles to overcome. But love took two. Unrequited love was a totally different ball game, and it seemed that was the only type he was offering.
“You’re wrong,” she said, staring him down. “But if you’re not even willing to stand by me and believe in what we could have, then maybe it is better that