wooden table with two chairs is snug against it, with a red swirl tablecloth covering part of the wood, a half-burnt white candle positioned centrally in a holder.
I’m in the right place.
Come home, Jim. Come home.
Despite the warmth of the flat, the home he has made for himself, it feels wrong to continue snooping without him here. I’m an intruder and for all I know, those kids have run downstairs to tell their parents to call the police.
But I don’t want to leave.
This flat is lovely. Every corner is complete, every item has a place.
A home.
God, it feels like home.
And anyway, where else should I go? Right now? Surely Jim will be back soon, and without doubt at some point tonight. I’m so tired that the thought of traipsing back into the city and showing my face at that hostel again is too much to fathom. I might even have to share a dorm! Besides, I can’t handle any form of transport that isn’t my feet dragging me to a bed. Not tonight.
Sitting back into Jim’s sofa, I let my eyes close over. But my phone rings.
It’s one of those video calls.
Hm. Why is Leon Taylor calling me? I messaged him back to say sorry, I can’t make the brunch. What does he want now? Unless he’s calling me by accident. I look at the screen and laugh, because of course, of course, of course it’s a mistake. This guy has never called me in his life. Generic brunch invite, yes. Normal. A video call? No. He must have knocked his phone while it was unlocked, for sure. I let it ring out.
Closing my eyes again, sinking deeper into the sofa, I enjoy the near-silence, traffic echoing outside. I’m all safe, cocooned inside this darling little flat.
My phone rings again.
‘What the—’ I say, and decide to answer. ‘Hello? Leon?’
The screen is pixelated and a delay causes a rustle of feedback before I hear, ‘Zara? Is that you?’
‘Of course it’s me,’ I laugh. ‘You called me. Who else would it be?’
‘Zara, can you hear me?’
I still can’t see him properly on the screen. The sound quality is bad.
‘What did you say? Leon?’
The camera shakes, then comes into focus.
I sit up straight and hold the phone before my face, staring into the screen. With a white wall, a white tiled floor and a large grey L-shaped sofa visible in the background, there’s no denying that sort of apartment. Clinical, ultra-modern and drenched in Ikea, furniture bought to be temporary. I take in my own surroundings. This is a prank, surely. It’s a prank. Only who’s playing it on me? And why would they? Unless I fell asleep just moments ago and I’m caught in the middle of a bizarre dream.
‘No … it can’t be … Jim?’
‘Hiya, love.’
40
Jim
As soon as Zara answers the phone and switches on her camera, I know where she is. I know every crease in the back of that settee. There’s a Lightsaber behind her, resting against a cushion, and I know it belongs to the Wongs’ antisocial kids.
‘Jim? Am I seeing things?’
‘Wait, surely I’m seeing things?’
‘You’re in Dubai?’ she shrieks, but I can’t help cutting in.
‘Zara, hold on. Why are you in me flat?’
‘Because, because … no, you hold on. Why are you in Dubai? What the hell, Jim?’
‘I came here to … oh, I dunno. Fucking hell, Zara!’
‘What?’
‘What do you mean, what?!’ I tug at my hair, my fingertips cold from the fierce air-conditioning. Words fail me; my insides squeeze into knots. Oh, how familiar these feelings are at simply hearing Zara’s voice, and yet I can’t bear the sharp blast of disappointment that’s just hit me. Why isn’t she here? Why the holy almighty fuck is she there?
‘You came here to …’ Zara says, repeating my words. ‘To what?’
‘I said I dunno!’
‘Stop shouting!’
‘I’m not shouting!’
‘You are!’
‘Well, so are you!’
The lens focuses – or the connection improves – and Zara’s face suddenly becomes even clearer, bringing her closer to me. Yet she’s so very far away.
‘I did what I do,’ she says.
I squint. ‘Go on.’
‘What?’
‘Elaborate.’
‘Oh God, Jim. You know!’
‘Do I?’
‘Yes! I did what I do, I came to find you, to surprise you and … No. No! This doesn’t make any sense. Why are you in Dubai? That’s where I live. Or lived. Oh, I don’t know anything or what to think. Agh!’
Her mouth hangs open and for a moment, I wonder if the screen has frozen.