Never Always Sometimes - Adi Alsaid Page 0,56

missing out on a major part of adolescence.”

“Wasting time in a symbol of capitalism is a major part of

adolescence?”

“You’re goddamn right,” Gretchen said, her voice giving away her

desire to laugh, and damn if Julia didn’t find that charming. Julia

suddenly felt nauseous. Gretchen stood up, pulling out a set of car

keys from the pocket of her jeans. “Come on, I’ll drive. We’re going to

the mall.”

“I feel like she’s not going to let this go,” Julia said, getting up

and standing by Gretchen. They were similarly built, Julia noticed.

Almost the exact same height, though Julia wasn’t wearing shoes, and

Gretchen’s hair gave her an extra quarter inch. Julia had no idea why

that would matter, why she would suddenly start measuring herself

against this girl who was nothing like her. “You and I are rebels. We

should rebel against capitalism by defacing it with the refusal to spend money. Plus, it wasn’t on the list, but it may as well have been. We’re

looking for ordinary high school experiences, and if Gretchen says this

one’s worth doing, well then, let’s give it a shot.”

“Thank you, Julia,” Gretchen said, and Julia watched as she reached

over and grabbed Dave by the wrist, pulling him up to his feet, her

fingers lingering on his skin like they were used to touching him, like

they belonged on him.

On the drive to the mall, Julia discovered backseats are a kind of hell

188 NEVER ALWAYS SOMETIMES

when you are there on your own. She’d sat behind Gretchen, giving

her a clear view of Dave and how often he looked toward the driver’s

side. She could barely hear the conversation, and had to stick her face

in between theirs to not feel like she was on a deserted island.

“I have to hand it to you, Gretchen,” Julia said at the first opportunity she could. “You are rocking this minivan so well that I can’t tell if you’re doing it ironically or not.”

“Oh, you mean Vantastic? No irony here; I love this thing. It’s been

in the family for about twenty years. I couldn’t wait to drive it, even

though half the time I’m in it I am actively fearing death.”

Dave glanced over his shoulder at Julia, giving her a smile that she

understood immediately: Isn’t she so much more than you thought? Julia stuck her tongue out at Dave, the move feeling too middle school even

as she did it, like a girl desperate to be cute.

When they walked in through the glass doors of the mall, Julia

instinctively cringed. “Dave, tell Gretchen what the look on my face

means.”

“She’s going to throw up.”

“You guys are ridiculous.”

They were walking in the direction of the food court, the three of

them in a row, Dave in the middle. Julia spotted the kid who’d fallen

asleep on her couch after the party, but he was a bit too far away to

yell at.

“So,” Dave said, “how, exactly, does one mall-rat?”

“Technically, we’ve started.” Gretchen extended her arms outward,

JULIA 189

as if presenting them with a new world. “Yaaaay,” she said, poking just

enough fun at herself for Julia to feel a shift starting to take place. Julia was starting to like Gretchen, and it shouldn’t have been a problem. It

should have been great, all the more reason to be happy for Dave. But it was a problem, one that caused her throat to dry up. “Actually, I know the best way to break you guys into this,” Gretchen said. “And I’ll admit, this isn’t exactly within the normal mall-ratting activity. But it’s my favorite thing to do, especially on days when I’m feeling a little down.”

She took them to the food court and ordered a single ice-cream

cone, not allowing them to get their own. Then she led them toward

the escalators down to the first floor, only licking away the drops that threatened to drip onto her hand. A little kid in front of them dangled

his shoelaces near the gap at the edge of the escalator stairs while his mom stared at her phone, her free hand gripping his like that was

all there was to parenting. Julia caught Gretchen shaking her head.

They walked past what seemed to be the same exact athletic shoe store

replicated in three different spots, then entered the pet store that was tucked away in the corner.

It was a sad place, puppies in glass cages, frolicking as much as they

could, trying to avoid little puddles of pee they’d left behind. Some

yipped happily, some whimpered, some looked defeated and just stared

through the glass as if they’d given up. A mutt with short brown fur lay on its front paws, looking up at Julia with big,